Forgotten
by Humanity's Curse
Summary: Forced to dress as a guy when she is really a girl, Scarlett isn't exactly normal. Her tragic past is a secret that no one other than her and her useless father know. However, when a new guy transfers into her class and becomes interested in the strange "boy", will Scarlett give up her secret or keep her past hidden?
1. Chapter 1

**Hi fellow fanfictioners. So this is my first fanfic and I'm not really sure if it's good or not. I apologize if it sucks but please bear with me. This is the first chapter and it's kinda long and boring, but then again most first chapters are. I hope you like it and thanks for reading! Enjoy ^-^**

A young girl skipped happily through the tall grass of her backyard, humming a slight tune and smiling as her little stuffed rabbit that she always carried with her drug slightly on the ground. Birds sang and the sky was clear and pretty. The city of L.A. thrummed and throbbed in the background noise of the girl's head, but it was still too distant to penetrate the barrier of her backyard and enter her world. She skipped up onto a large, spacious porch that wrapped around the side of the huge house she and her parents lived in.

The house was white and tall; two stories. It had a beautiful garden and a gigantic yard. In the hallway off the staircase, there was a little room painted light pink. There was a small twin bed with a little white comforter covered in pink flowers on it and stuffed animals sitting against the headboard and pillows. A bookshelf and fish tank were in the corner of the room and scattered about the floor were crayons and coloring books.

The little girl entered the familiarity of her room, placing down her stuffed rabbit. Giggling, she doodled in her coloring book, smiling at her pretty picture. Just as the girl was finishing her picture, she heard the sound of her parents' car doors slamming and she rushed to the door.

"Mamma, mamma come see what I did," she said excitedly as she tugged open the front door. Her father stood in front of her, blocking her mother from view.

"Scarlett, move," he said harshly. "Daddy needs you to leave."

The little girl, confused and slightly hurt by her father's sharp tone, said, "But daddy I…."

"Scarlett listen to me when I talk to you! Don't be stupid you worthless girl," he yelled. After that, he pushed her forcefully out of the way, causing her to fall. She fell with great force against the wall, slamming her head, and then she cried. "Mamma daddy hurt me! Daddy why are you being mean," she sobbed.

Her father was partially up the stairs but he whirled when he heard his daughter cry out. "Don't you dare talk to your mother! That worthless woman! Both of you are worthless," he yelled, causing the little girl to cry more.

Just then, her mother came into the house. The little girl jumped up, running forward and wrapping her arms around her mother's legs, burying her tear stained face in her skirt. Her mother mechanically stopped moving, looking vacantly down at her daughter. The empty look in her mother's green eyes frightened the girl. "Mommy…...," she questioned, trailing off.

Though she was young, the girl noticed the difference in her mother. She saw the absence of light and warmth in her mother's eyes. The happiness so familiar to her was no longer there. In its place was a vacant look of pain and emptiness. There were tear stains and one large splotch of red skin with the imprint of a hand on the woman's cheeks and her daughter noticed them, becoming even more scared. Her mother looked lifeless; she looked broken. And though the little girl didn't know why mommy was crying and she didn't understand why daddy was being horrible, she did understand that whatever happened that day would change everything.

She tugged lightly on her mother's skirt, "Mommy..." No response. She tugged again. No response. And so she tugged again, and this time the woman pushed her away gently, walking as though she were a puppet on strings, down the hall past where the little girl's room was, and entering the second door. The little girl was never allowed in that room, but now, as she followed her mother into it, she was aware of why. The walls were painted a light shade of blue and it was unmistakably meant to be a nursery. There was a crib and toys and a rocking chair and many other things the little girl recognized as baby supplies.

In the center of the room, the girl's mother collapsed, falling to her knees and letting out the heart broken sobs of a woman who has just lost a child. The little girl understood that her mother was hurting and that this room that she was never allowed in was meant for a baby boy…..and though she was young, she also realized that the baby boy was dead, and that he was supposed to be her brother.

The little girl slowly and quietly backed out of the pale blue room, letting her mother mourn the broken child she was never to have. She didn't want to go upstairs and see her father, afraid of being pushed or called worthless again. However, she wanted to talk to someone. She didn't want to hear her mother cry…..but that was all there was to do.

The rest of the day, the little girl sat in her room, doodling and coloring, reading and playing with her stuffed animals, but she was lonely. She wanted a friend, but there was no one in her house who cared. She could constantly hear her mother's sobbing and she constantly wished she could fix it. She knew she couldn't. And so she finally stood up and went and sat in a dark corner of her room, against the bookshelf, huddled up with her hands covering her ears and quietly sobbing, trying to ignore the sound of her mother crying and wishing that she didn't know all the things she did.

…..

I sat up with a jolt, the screeching of my alarm clock pulling me from my dream. _Damn it_, I thought groggily. Why did I have _that_ dream of all dreams? Slamming my fist on the alarm clock and laying down, I tiredly rubbed my eyes. After laying in the pale stillness of my room, I sat up again and looked around.

My room was tiny and cramped and totally messy. Clothes were strewn everywhere and the room was musty and dank. Everything about the room was gray and moldy and the smell of decay and vomit filled the air. Water stains decorated my ceiling and the smell of pot floated to me from the room upstairs. "Stupid potheads," I muttered to myself, thinking of the two assholes that lived above me and my worthless father in this Godforsaken building.

I swung my feet out of bed and cringed as they hit the cold cement floor. (Yeah, you heard me right. I said cement. This apartment complex is so cheap they can't even afford carpet.) I stretched stiffly and felt my bones ache as the joints cracked; whether they were stiff due to sleeping on a horrible bed while it's cold or due to my father, I couldn't say just then.

After stretching, I padded silently out of my room and across the tiny hall to the bathroom. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and grimaced. I looked horrible.

I think now is the time I should introduce myself. My name is Scarlett Citali, or Lett for short, and I'm sixteen years old. When I was eight, my mother came home from a doctor's appointment where she found out that my brother died in the womb, hence the reason for the dream. After she found out about my brother's death, she lost it. She lived in his room, slowly wasting away and becoming a doll, forever my unborn brother's toy. She used to talk to him and sing lullabies, and the only thing keeping her alive was my father. Ironically, the only thing keeping my father from letting her die in that damned room was his enjoyment of beating her. See, my father _really_ wanted a son, and when we lost Damon, that was going to be his name, he lost it, too. He became an alcoholic and druggie; he used to beat my mother and me for fun because we were useless women. My mother became an insane person who didn't care if she was beat and abused and who lived in her dead child's room, raising him. And I was in the middle.

At the age of eight I pretty much grew up. I learned to survive without the nurturing care of parents and I was used to being alone. My father yelled, sometimes calling me a pathetic bitch, other times calling me a failure, and other times blaming me for Damon's death. No matter what I did, my father loathed me and my mother. And I grew up loathing him and her both.

Since my father wanted a son really bad, and because my mother forgot she had a child other than Damon, my father enrolled me in school as a boy. He forced me to wear boys' clothing and kept my hair cut short. He even had me wrap my chest when I started to develop breasts. And every night I came home to a beating. No matter how well I played the part of a boy, I was always the wretched girl that wasn't supposed to be born.

Luckily, I do look kind of masculine. I have a pale, narrow face and a thin mouth. My eyes are an ugly shade of blue and my hair is the color of dark wine, somewhere between purple and red. I am relatively flat-chested and I could probably survive without wrapping, however if my father ever found out I would probably be beaten to the point of not being able to stand. I'm not very tall, probably 5'7" at the most, but I still have the reputation of the biggest trouble maker and fighter in the school. So far, I've been undefeated.

Now that you know me, I'll continue talking. After looking in the mirror, I brushed my teeth and then washed some of the dirt off my face. Sadly, some of the 'dirt' turned out to be bruises so I obviously couldn't get them off, but it didn't matter anyway. I went to school as a guy notorious for fighting. Scrapes and bruises were normal on me. Isn't it ironic how I get all my bruises from my father and almost never a single one from school? Anyway, after that, I threw on my usual black jeans, t-shirt, and vans. I chose to wear a purple beanie and put in a pair of earrings my father didn't know I had. He still hasn't seen my ear piercings and I've had 'em for a few years. He'd be super pissed if he saw them but he never does cause he's always drunk. One of the perks of alcoholism, right?

Once I was dressed, I threw my backpack over my shoulder and put on my signature sunglasses, then walked into the living room, where my father was snoring in the recliner with some half dressed woman in his lap. Gross. I sighed in annoyance and opened the door, making sure to slam it behind me. The pleasant sound of screamed profanities from my beloved father followed me down the stairs as I started my long walk to school. I knew I would get a good beating later because I woke him and his one-night-stand up, but I didn't really give a damn. What's one more bruise in a sea of others?

**So what'd you think? Is it any good? I'm still debating whether to continue this idea or not and I would love to know your opinions or hear any suggestions you have.** **Don't forget to favorite, follow, and review, k? **

**-Scarlett**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi again. This is the next chapter of my story. Merry late Xmas and Happy New Year! Hope everyone had a great holiday and I'm sorry for the long abscence. Anyway, enjoy!**

**p.s- I don't own Max Ride. James Patterson does.**

Soon after I had left the hellhole of an apartment, I realized that I had left my iPod in my room. Sighing in frustration, I grimaced at the thought of the already terrible walk to school and how now I didn't even have my music to help ease the agony. Groaning, I walked quickly through the streets of the city. In case you couldn't tell from my room's description, I live in the shitty part of town. Police sirens sing me to sleep each night and drug busts, robberies, rape, and gang shootings are familiar and not uncommon. The streets are extremely unsafe, but because my father is a worthless piece of shit and I have to pay for everything on my own, it's all I can afford. My apartment right now is so crappy that I only have to pay $64 a month. That leaves me about $40 for food. Awesome living conditions, right?

After about fifteen minutes of trudging through the busy streets, I finally reached Martha's. Martha's is a diner where I work and, once upon a time, my mom did, too. It's owned by Sue, a sweet old woman who practically raised me once my mother went insane. Of course, since she's known me since I was about four, I gave her the nickname Grams, and to this day I call her that. Every morning on my way to school, I stop by and she gives me something for breakfast. I used to fight with her about it, telling her not to waste her time and money feeding me, but after years of her insisting, I finally gave up. As I entered the warm diner, the little silver bell hanging from the door jingled, alerting the people around of my presence. The smell of bacon, sausage, and pancakes cooking, along with the blessed smell of coffee being brewed, attacked my senses as I walked toward the bar and my stomach growled.

When I reached the bar, Sue looked up and smiled the warm, loving smile that has made me feel better since I was a kid. "Well," she said incredulously, "If it isn't my favorite little bird! Is that really you, Lett? You're never this early! Is there something wrong?"

I smiled and shook my head. "No, nothing's wrong. I just woke up earlier than normal and dad wasn't awake so I didn't have to deal with him."

Sue's face grew dark. "Did he do anything to you," she asked quietly, sounding extremely concerned.

I forced my voice to stay light and my smile to stick. "Grams," I said chidingly, "I told you that he doesn't hit me anymore! He stopped years ago, after you yelled at him and threatened to take me away. Now he's just a drunkard who can't take care of himself." Everything I said was a blatant lie, but the relief on Sue's face when she heard this is the reason I've been lying to her since I was ten. There used to be a time when I thought of letting her know that my father beats me every day so that she could adopt me, but then I thought of being a burden to her. Sue is too old and too nice to deal with my bullshit, and once my father threatened her safety, I knew I could never tell her.

You see, when I was ten, Sue saw my dad hit me for asking him to buy me a pair of new shoes. We were outside of the diner and my father was so drunk that it didn't occur to him to wait until we got home to beat me. Sue became pissed and stormed out of her diner, yelling at my dad and pulling me away from him. I was terrified of what was going to happen, but the two adults just yelled and eventually some guy in his twenties came by and escorted me and Sue into the diner. I could tell my dad was furious, but he knew I would come home so he just stumbled drunkenly away. After hours of having Sue fawn over me and worry, I told her that I had to go home. She refused multiple times, but finally said yes when I told her that I needed to or father would come looking for me. She reluctantly allowed me to leave but made me promise to tell her if he laid a finger on me and I'd never have to see the wretched man again. Of course, when I got home I got the worst beating I'd had in years, and I was thinking of my promise to Sue as my father kicked me so hard that I couldn't breathe. When he was finally done, he bent down, smirking as he whispered into my ear, "If you tell that bitch anything, I'll find you and her, and you'll both wish you were dead, understand?"

And now you know why I sat there lying through my teeth as Sue just laughed and nodded, reassured by my 'honesty' and false smile. Her eyes then widened as she said, "Oh gosh, I'd better get you your breakfast so you can be on your way! You're up early enough that you might not be late to class today and here I am, rambling on!" She then walked into the kitchen and yelled something to her husband, Jack, before returning to me, holding out a brown paper bag. I smiled and took it, chuckling as she ranted about not wanting me to be late. "See you later Grams. I'm working the late shift tonight, right?"

"Oh, of course not! I'll just make one of the college students do it! You've got finals and homework!"

I was almost out the door, and I called over my shoulder, "Nah, it's fine! I'll see you at five! And thanks for breakfast Grams!" I continued to chuckle as I heard her yell of protest and jogged to the corner before quickly regaining my normal, grim aura. I opened the bag Grams had given me and saw that inside was a blueberry muffin that looked like it had sugar on top and then an apple. I pulled out the muffin, planning on eating it, when I saw a little boy who appeared to be about nine huddling in an alley nearby. I sighed, walking over to him and standing a few feet away.

"Hey kid," I said, my voice rough and demanding his attention. He flinched, looking up at me. I saw bruises and scrapes on his face and I immediately felt an ache of sympathy for the kid. I knew what that felt like. "You want this?" I held the muffin out to him. He looked startled and shook his head. "Don't lie. I know you do. Take it," I said, pushing it closer to him. When he still didn't take the muffin, I cussed under my breath and walked forward, crouching directly in front of him. He stared at me before his eyes widened.

"Y-you're the high school guy that b-beats up everyone, r-right?"

I sighed again. Of course the starving nine year old knew of my reputation. I mean, come on, the world wasn't gonna catch me a break just because I was being nice. No, it just _had_ to make things complicated. Stupid world. "Yeah, but that's not important. Look kid, you want the muffin or not?"

The boy continued to stare in wide-eyed wonder. Then he held out his hands hesitantly. I smiled triumphantly and gently laid the muffin in his hand, ruffling his hair slightly. "Good boy." He looked up and smiled a little, before looking the other way again. I could have sworn he was blushing as he said, "Thanks." I just shook my head and stood, patting his head and turning. "Be careful, kid," I called over my shoulder. When I got to the mouth of the alley, I heard the boy call out, "H-hey!"

I turned around, facing him once more. "You're really pretty, you know that, right," he asked. My eyes widened but before I could respond, the little boy took off running, probably afraid that the high school badass was gonna beat him to a pulp for calling him pretty. After my shock from the encounter with the boy, I finished my walk to school, the whole way there thinking of him. Why the hell had he called me pretty? No one calls me pretty. I'm an ugly little wretch if you ask my father. The girls at my school think I'm hot but that doesn't count because they don't even know I'm a chick….. What made him call me pretty? The encounter was starting to bug me but I pushed it out of my mind as I walked onto my high school campus.

I attend Westside High and I'm a sophomore. The principal hates my guts and the teachers aren't much better. The guys fear me, hate me, or think I'm awesome and respect me. The girls are in between thinking I'm an asshole who needs his ass kicked and thinking I'm extremely hot. The only people on campus who are nice to me are my friends and the music teacher. Mrs. Shelbey loves me because I apparently have "musical talent" and my friends love me for reasons completely unknown to me.

As I strolled lazily onto campus, I got stares of complete wonderment. I was never on time and the closest I got to it was being five minutes late. I tried not to freak with all the attention I was getting (I hate attention), and carefully kept up my careless, "I-don't-give-a-fuck" persona. I ignored the eyes burning a hole in me and just walked to my favorite spot on campus- the roof. Sitting up there, I could be free of the idiots that surrounded me in classrooms and the so-called authority figures of the school. Plus, I have a thing for heights and that's the highest place around campus so it's a win win situation.

When I had reached the roof and escaped the scandalized whispers and looks of the school below, I sighed in relief, letting the cool morning breeze kiss my cheeks and tug through the short hair escaping my beanie. I walked to the edge of the building, plopping down on the hard concrete and letting my feet just dangle in the open air below.

As I sat there in serene silence, the little boy popped into my head again. He was really starting to bug me, and I couldn't even figure out the full reason why. Part of me was annoyed because he'd had the nerve to call me, _me_ of all people pretty and then runaway, but part of me was annoyed that I knew it was a lie. The little boy had clearly believed it, that would even explain his blush, but I knew for a fact he was wrong. I am not pretty. My skin is too pale and hollow looking. My hair is short and messy, constantly looking like I tumbled out of bed headfirst. My eyes lost the light of childhood and are now mercilessand dead. My heart is frozen, a frigid, gaping hole in my chest, and I am a complete and total failure at life.

So no, I am not pretty. And honestly, I don't really want to be. But is it too much to ask to be seen for who I really am? Am I terrible for wishing I could dress like a normal girl? Is it wrong that I want to be able to act stupid and immature sometimes? Shouldn't I be allowed to be weak and cry every once in a while? Shouldn't my father love me and my mother remember me? No….no I'm wrong. I'm a boy. I can't be weak and I definitely can't cry. I can't laugh and play and be silly and immature like other girls…..I have to be strong. I have to be Damon. After all, it was him who damned me to this life, so I'd better do a good job playing the part.

I had only been up on my roof thinking for about ten minutes when I heard the bell ring. I groaned and hauled myself up, trudging down the stairs and missing the tranquility of my roof already.

I reached my Homeroom, which just happens to be history, in record time and when I entered the room, everyone went silent. The teacher, Mr. Bright, gave me a skeptical look before continuing to write on his board. Shrugging indifferently, I walked to my seat in the back, dropping my bag with a loud thud and moodily slouching into my seat. Mr. Bright and a few of the other students gave me dirty looks, but when I gave them a cold stare and growled, "What're you looking at," all of them flinched and turned away, and the talking in the room picked up again. Sighing, I propped my feet on the empty desk in front of me and pulled out my apple, taking a noisy bite. People were staring again but I pretended not to notice. You can't eat an apple quietly, after all.

As I ate my apple, I listened to the conversations going on in the room, all of them turning out to be pointless and stupid. Why does this generation have to be so dumb? So petty? All that matters are looks and money and popularity. Everyone wears a mask and no one wants to admit they're liars. They'll crucify anyone to get to where they want to go and at the end of the day, it's all for nothing. They'll still be the same person, no matter what clothes they wear and the people they know. And every day it makes me more and more sick.

Just as I got to that lovely thought, the bell finally decided to ring, signaling the beginning of class. Mr. Bright turned from his board and looked at his students. Since no one was paying attention and everyone was still talking, he took his yard stick and slammed it on his desk with a loud _crack_. Flinching, everyone shut up.

"Good morning class," he said in a bored tone. "Today we have a new student. I'll have him introduce himself and then we can go on with the day like normal." I groaned in annoyance as Bright went to open the door so he could get the new student from the hall, knowing my already shitty mood was about to get worse. Bright re-entered the room, a tall guy with dark hair following behind him. Immediately the class erupted into whispers. Girls were saying how sexy he was and guys were debating whether he was cool enough to hang out with and it was literally pandemonium. While everyone whispered, the guy stood at the front of the room, examining the class. I took that time to examine him.

He was about 6'2 and lean. His dark, raven hair was a little above shoulder length and cut so it hung in jagged pieces around his face and partially covered his obsidian eyes. The guy was pale and silent but there was something almost cocky in the way he stood. Apparently black was the theme with this guy, because on top of his black hair and eyes, he was wearing all black clothes. Black jeans, black t-shirt, black combat boots, and black leather jacket. I couldn't figure out if he was emo or just obsessed with the color. Either way, I didn't really care.

I decided that he wasn't bad looking. However, he seemed like he was one of the arrogant guys that thought he could get any girl. Inwardly groaning, I thought about how inconvenient it was that he had shown up today and how I really didn't want to deal with this bullshit. Just then, Mr. Bright yelled, "Everyone shut up! Now, will you please introduce yourself?"

The guy at the front of the room smirked and nodded. "Sup. I'm Nick Ride, but call me Fang. I moved here from Nevada and I'm always ready for a good time. I love sports and girls," he finished with a wink, causing every girl to flip out. Damn this guy was pissing me off! I hate new students in general because they always cause a scene but this guy was just annoying!

"Everyone shut up! Nick, go sit in the back by Lett. Raise your hand Lett," Bright yelled.

I groaned, silently asking God what I'd done to piss him off recently and apologizing for it fast. You've got to be kidding me! And now, ladies and gentlemen, you know why I'm always late.

**So I am really, really unhappy with the way this chapter came out and I'm totally not proud of it. Sorry if it sucks but thanks for reading. I'm sorry for the long wait too cuz my Internet was shut off the day I went to post this chapter. I was really sad. I'm gonna try to update more often but no promises cause I'm back to school. Don't forget to favorite, follow, and review! **

**-Scarlett**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter three is done! Finally! I worked for a while on this chapter, not quite sure where I wanted it to go….but here it is. Enjoy!**

I sat in silence. Bright had _not _just said that, right? All year, I had had the back corner all to myself, ignored by the rest of the class. If this Fang guy sat next to me, I would never be alone again! No, no, no, _no_! Bright couldn't do that to me! To prove my point, I didn't raise my hand. Maybe Bright would take the hint?

"Lett I said raise your hand," he screeched over the whining of the students, who had decided to talk more when they'd heard this guy was supposed to sit next to me. Everywhere, students were muttering about how it was stupid for the new, cool guy to sit next to me of all people. The whole school knew I was an ass and only had a few friends so why put the new guy through such torture? Why make him suffer when every other student in the school would've been _way_ nicer and_ so _much better than me?

Gritting my teeth, I tried to shut out all the comments. _They don't hurt,_ I mentally told myself. _You're strong. Just ignore it. They don't give a damn about you so you shouldn't give a damn about what they think._ As I was trying to silently talk myself out of a break down and ignore the hateful comments being shot at me, I heard Bright mutter something that sounded vaguely like "Damn delinquent. Why can't he just get expelled or drop out all ready?" I tried not to flinch.

"Alright Fang, since Lett refuses to raise his hand, I'll tell you where to go. See that boy in the back with his feet propped on the desk wearing a purple beanie? That's your new seat buddy. Have fun," Bright said in a tone that showed that he highly doubted Fang would have 'fun.'

Fang nodded, walking down the aisle of desks toward the back, winking at girls and nodding his head in the universal 'sup' gesture to guys. He was already popular and it was just first period. By the end of the day, he'd be chilling with the jocks. I really wanted to punch him in his pretty little face.

Taking a seat, Fang placed his bag on the ground near mine and turned to me. "Hi, I'm Fang. Sup, bro?"

As soon as he opened his mouth I immediately hated him. 'Sup, bro?' Really? That's the best he could do? Swallowing the rude comment I was about to spit at him, I instead grumbled, "Hi."

Fang looked at me and I could tell he was expecting more, but I just cocked an eyebrow at him, silently asking him what he wanted. "That's it," he asked. "Who taught you manners?"

I clenched my jaw, looking away from him. I wanted to hit him _so bad_, but I couldn't get expelled. Not if I wanted to live anyway. So I just sat there, glaring angrily out the window as Bright finally got everyone to shut up and started his lesson.

After a few minutes of staring off into space, I glanced out of the corner of my eye. Fang was no longer looking at me and was instead throwing a note to the red head a few rows ahead of us. She giggled and winked while Fang just smirked. Then he turned back to his notes. _Wow, _I thought snidely. _The douche actually knows how to take notes and pay attention in class. Well….sorta._ Suddenly bored with watching Fang and his red head, I think her name was Marcie, I decided to doodle instead. I quietly pulled my sketchbook from my backpack and grabbed my favorite pen. While I was doing this, of course, Fang saw me and became curious.

"What're you doing?"

Completely ignoring him, I flipped to an empty page in the book, realizing with disappointment that I only had about ten pages before I'd filled the whole thing. Sighing, I covered the page with my arm, making sure it was impossible for Fang to see, and began drawing.

"Hello, I asked you a question? Are you drawing or just writing depressing poetry in there," he asked, completely ignoring the fact that I was obviously not interested in acknowledging his existence in any way whatsoever.

I continued to draw, trying to tone out the infuriating jackass sitting next to me. I glanced up from my work and looked towards Marcie, who appeared pretty pissed that Fang had forgotten her so fast and was now focused on me, the delinquent. Deciding that she was my best chance, I continued to focus on her and the area around her. Maybe dumbass extraordinaire would see my line of focus and face Marcie again, suddenly remembering her existence and forgetting mine. Of course, I'm not that lucky. Instead of facing her, he just leaned over out of his seat, apparently thinking I was distracted and that he could sneak a peek inside of my notebook. Sadly, he was wrong. I casually flicked his forehead, smirking at the hiss of surprise and pain it elicited, and then went back to my sketch.

"What the hell did you flick me for!? And what are you drawing," Fang spit out in a whisper.

Suddenly fed up with his annoying voice and irritating questions, I turned and faced him, my eyes cold and hard. "I'm drawing pictures of the people I plan on killing. Would you like to join the list," I hissed. The look of surprise on his face was completely satisfying. The look of triumph killed that satisfaction.

"Oh, so you can talk? I was afraid for a moment that you were mute. You know, I never pegged you as the murderous type," he smirked, clearly all too pleased that he managed to make me crack.

I chewed the inside of my lip, silently cursing myself for ever responding to him in the slightest. "I would really hate to have to kill you so would you kindly _leave me alone_," I said, making sure to enunciate 'leave me alone' very clearly.

Fang sighed dramatically. "What's your name? Come on, you really shouldn't be this difficult."

I released my lip, deciding that Fang must be some new breed of moron. Sighing in absolute irritation, I growled, "If you were listening to the teacher when he told you where to sit instead of trying to mentally fuck the red head you were staring at, you'd know my name now wouldn't you?"

Fang cocked an eyebrow. "So your name is Lett? What kind of name is that?"

Looking up at the ceiling and taking a deep, calming breath, I silently prayed that God wouldn't let me murder this boy. I really didn't want to go to jail for something as helpful as that. Releasing my breath, I shot back at him, "What kind of name is Nick? It's not my fault I've got this name just like it's not your fault you've got yours."

"Nick is a completely normal name! More normal than yours."

"Oh and I assume Fang is a normal name, too?"

"Well no. But it's awesome and chicks love it."

I looked at him and rolled my eyes, knowing he was completely serious. _Idiot, _I thought, putting away my sketchbook and looking out the window once more. The rest of the class I spent diligently staring out the window and pretending Fang didn't exist. Maybe if I pretended long enough, he'd actually disappear?

**God I'm so happy I finished this chapter! I really didn't have any idea where I wanted to take this chapter and it was actually really hard for me to write. I'm not proud of it at all, but at least it's done. Thanks for reading and don't forget to favorite, follow, and review. **

**-Scarlett**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi again. Alright so I feel really bad about chapter three and I'm super sorry it sucked. I've been re-writing this chapter all week (once my evil uncle gave me back my laptop which he took for no reason ) and I finally decided that it was decent enough to post. Anyway, here's chapter four. Enjoy ^-^**

After first period, I discovered that I have fourth and sixth period with Fang, too. Words cannot describe how utterly disgusted I am by that simple, terrible fact.

As I stood up from my seat in fourth period and stretched, I heard the giggles and laughter of the sluts- oops, I mean _girls_- who were flirting with Nick. I'd heard that through my whole math lesson, and I tried to hold back vomit as I listened to it now. Thank God it was lunch.

I slung my bag lazily over my shoulder, but as I was walking, I felt someone grab the strap. Pissed, I whirled around, ready to punch that someone in the face. The person I saw was none other than the annoying idiot that has been plaguing me all day.

"Let go of my bag," I said threateningly. Nick just rolled his eyes, smirking and waving bye to the group of girls. Tired of being held captive and going insane with being near Nick for longer than already necessary, I yanked my bag from his grasp and stormed from the room. I began to walk to where I ate with my friends, hoping to get to that peaceful spot before I lost my mind. As I was turning toward the stairs to walk to the roof, an all too familiar, completely irritating voice said from behind me, "So where're we going?"

I spun to face him, unable to hold in my aggravation. "_We _are not going anywhere. _I_ am going to go eat in peace and _you_ are going to go sit with all the people who adore you, understand? There is no we. I don't know what kind of idiot you are, but I don't like you and it's pretty damn obvious so go away! There are a million people who would love to talk to you and I'm not one of them," I spat in a sharp, cruel tone. Nick, however, didn't react in any way at all and kept his face perfectly stoic. Feeling even more annoyed, I spun back around and stomped up the stairs. I reached the door leading onto the roof where me and my friends ate and sighed. Nick was still behind me and I could tell he wasn't going to leave. _Damn him. I hope he gets hit by a train_, I thought bitterly.

"You better not be an ass," I mumbled, opening the door and walking to my regular spot. I could feel Nick's triumph as he followed me toward my friends. I guess I should probably introduce them now, huh?

I'll start off with the people I've known longest. Audrey and Adrian Dark have been my friends since childhood. They know my secret (not that I'm abused but that I'm actually a girl) and they've put up with more of my shit than anyone.

Audrey is my age. She's fun to be around and pretty popular with the guys, which I find hilarious due to the fact that she's lesbian. Her dark, raven hair is long and falls perfectly, framing her face and bringing out her dark green eyes. She is short, only about 5'3, but if you tease her about her height she'll personally kick your ass. She constantly bickers with Adrian and is really quite violent. She will defend me through anything and is my partner in crime. All in all, she's the sister I never had.

Adrian is eighteen and will be graduating this year. I'll admit, when I was younger I had a small crush on him (not my fault the guy has a six-pack from the gods) but over the past few years it's faded, and I've begun thinking of him as my brother. He's about 6'1 with an athletic build and he has the dark eyes of his sister. His hair is about shoulder length and dark brown, falling around his face in erratic ways. Most girls find him extremely attractive and he is really popular around school, meaning he's got a lot of friends. Audrey used to say that me and him were going to fall in love one day, but so far it's never happened. He is one of my closest friends and I know I can rely on him for anything.

Next there's Nyx Morelli. She's quiet and relatively shy, but once you get to know her she can be really loud. She is usually an observer of the group, but when it comes down to it she can be a lot of fun. I swear to God she's some sort of fairy or something, but no one will believe me. Her elf-like features and quiet grace make her seem like she belongs in a fairytale. Long, velvety sliver-blue hair tumbles down her shoulders and frames her pale, elfin face, bringing out her porcelain skin and making it look perfect. Her eyes are large, light violet orbs that are clear and calculating, and her rosebud mouth is the perfect shade of pink. Altogether, she's stunningly beautiful.

Nori Izumi is a freshman and the youngest of our group. Everyone constantly teases him for his young age but we all love him; he's pretty much our baby. Nori seems to favor me and Audrey, but we can never guess why. He has dark blue-ish green hair with a short, messy ponytail and gold eyes. Usually seen wearing glasses and hiding behind his laptop or a book, I can honestly say he's my little nerd. Nori is pretty pessimistic and definitely a realist, and he has a slight narcissistic tendency.

The final member of our group is more recent and actually a friend of Adrian. Naoki Masaaki is my age and was expelled from his last school. His mother died in a car crash and his father abandoned him as a kid so he'd been jumping from foster home to foster home until Adrian had run into him on the streets a few months back and offered to let him stay with him and his family. Apparently the two had been childhood friends and Naoki was close to both Audrey and Adrian. He's normally pretty nice, but if you piss him off in any way, you'd better run. He carries a lot of baggage and can be pretty moody and scary sometimes, but he's ultimately a good guy. He also knows that I'm a girl, but only because he lives with Audrey and Adrian. Once he found out my secret, we became close, and now I think of him as my puppy (I'll explain why later). Naoki is tall and lean, muscular in a way that is noticeable but not unattractive. He has dark, messy black hair that hangs in his face and hides his eyes and multiple piercings in both ears. Dark, midnight blue eyes that are constantly brooding peek from behind his bangs and seem to constantly challenge you. Naoki's love is music and one of his dreams is to form a band.

So those are my friends more or less. Ultimately, they're my family.

When I finally reached my laughing friends, they all noticed me and smiled, saying greetings. When Adrian and Naoki scooted so I could take my normal spot in between them, everyone saw Nick and froze. They looked at me and everyone's expressions asked the same question- _what the hell?_ I sighed, acting like nothing was out of place. "Alright, will you all please stop staring like that? It's creeping me out."

"Um, Lett, you do realize you have a guy following you, right," Nori asked, clearly confused.

"That guy happens to have a name and can hear you. I'm Nick Ride, but you can call me Fang. I just moved here from Nevada. Nice to meet you." Nick nodded as way of saying hello.

Ignoring Nick's introduction, I sighed again. "Yes I do, Nori. He's been following me all day. It appears that no matter how many times I try to ditch him, he won't leave me alone. It's terribly annoying but I figure, what the hell? If he wants to hang out with me so much fine, whatever. I don't talk to him anyway." I shrugged in a 'what can you do' gesture and Nori seemed to be less confused, instead becoming rather amused by my lack of interest in the new boy.

"You do realize that I'm still standing right here and can hear everything you're saying, right," Nick asked from behind me, clearly annoyed.

"Yeah well I've come to realize that your hearing skills suck, Nick. I mean, come on. How many times have I told you to go away? Yet here you are. You're obviously deaf," I said tonelessly with no expression on my face. Adrian and Naoki laughed and Nori nearly choked on his rice. Nyx even cracked a small smile. The only person who seemed slightly sympathetic towards the boy behind me was Audrey, who looked at me chidingly and said, "Lett be nice! You obviously don't mind him being here that much or you would've knocked him out already."

I glared at her and fired back, "Not true! You know I can't get in any more fights for a while or that jackass Principal Reynolds is going to have me expelled! I've been trying not to kill Nick all day!"

Nick took this as his opportunity to cut in. "I told you to call me Fang so why do you keep calling me Nick," he questioned irritably.

"I don't take orders very well, _Nick_. And since you obviously don't like it when I call you by your real name, I think I'll keep doing it just to piss you off," I shot back.

"Whatever, _Lettie_," he replied as I scowled.

"Don't call me Lettie, jackass. My name is Lett."

Nick raised an eyebrow, mimicking my tone, "I don't take orders very well, _Lettie_."

I hissed, ready to retaliate, but Audrey cut me off before I could say anything. Giggling, she said, "Lett calm down! Fang, come sit by me! You're gonna be my new best friend!"

I shot daggers at Audrey with my eyes, but she didn't notice as she just jumped over to Nick's side and dragged him to the spot next to her. Sighing in defeat, I grumbled, "Since my friends apparently hate me and are letting you stay, I guess I should introduce them now. Your new best friend is Audrey, the boy who is next to her is her brother Adrian, the one with glasses is Nori, the fairy is Nyx, and the guy next to me is Naoki."

Nick smiled smugly. "Awww, thanks for introducing me Lettie. I'm sure we'll all be great friends."

Scoffing, I turned and stared at the scenic view of the campus garden below, trying to keep my bad mood in check. Around me, conversations started to take form, but I tuned them all out, wishing I was anywhere but there. The little boy flashed through my head, but I forced him away, refusing to think of my insignificance any longer. A sudden and sharp pain gripped my chest and it became unbearable to be near my happy friends and the intruder claiming to be one of them. Standing, I walked to the edge of the roof, looking down and half-heartedly contemplating how much pain I would be in if I jumped. It wouldn't be enough to make me forget.

Disappointed, I sighed and leaned against the wall as the breeze tousled my hair. Thoughts swam in and out of focus haphazardly but I refused to focus on any of them, afraid of what I might see. Not long after I had reached the wall, I felt the presence of someone beside me. Glancing from the corner of my eye, I saw that Naoki had walked over. He stood with his back against the wall, looking at me curiously with his head cocked to the side like a puppy's. Hiding my eyes from view with my hair, I mumbled, "What do you want Naoki?"

"I want to know what's up," he said as though it were obvious.

"The sky," I replied sarcastically. "Now that I've answered your amazingly deep question, will you leave me alone?"

Naoki sighed, moving closer to me and pulling lightly on my hair. "Thank you Captain Smartass, but you know that's not what I meant. I'm worried about you, not the sky. I'm positive that it isn't going to come crashing down anytime soon. You, however, are an entirely different case, Lett," he said affectionately.

I sighed, facing him and forcing a smile onto my features. "I'm not gonna come crashing down anytime soon. I'm fine and I hate it when you worry so just go hang out with everyone else, alright? I promise I'm okay." I was lying through my teeth, but at least he would be happy, right?

"Stop looking like a stabbed cat and drop the act, Lett. I know you better than that."

I winced, surprised that my façade wasn't working. Pain gripped me tighter as I realized that Naoki was worried about me, but I swallowed the lump forming in my throat. "I'm sorry," I muttered, not entirely sure what I was apologizing for. Maybe because I'm not worth Naoki's time or worry but he was worried about me anyway?

Naoki looked surprised, but then shook his head. He opened his arms. "C'mere," he said, gesturing for me to hug him.

I stood frozen for a moment before I walked into his embrace, letting him hug me. He was warm and smelled of leather and mint. He rested his chin on the top of my head and mumbled, "You don't have to be strong all the time, you know."

I shook my head briefly and pulled away, smiling my sad, stabbed cat smile. "Yeah I do. I'm a boy." Before I could hear what he had to say, I turned and walked back to the group, trying to cut the image of the sad look in Naoki's eyes from my head.

As I sat down with my friends again, I became aware of the fact that all eyes were on me. Pretending not to notice, I leaned back on my backpack and pulled my beanie down so it covered my eyes. _Maybe they won't talk to me_, I thought hopefully as I heard Naoki plop down beside me. I thought wrong.

"What's wrong, Lettie? Did you finally realize how emo you and your boyfriend look," Nick asked in a teasing tone. I sat up, pulling my beanie back so that I could see him.

"You know, I really do hate you," I muttered, glaring at Nick. He just laughed and ducked as I stole Naoki's fork and threw it at his face. "Remember that list I mentioned earlier? The one with the names of all the people I plan to kill? You are so on it."

Nick fake pouted. "Aww c'mon Lett. Don't be like that. You know you'd miss me if you killed me."

"I wouldn't miss you if you were oxygen," I said matter-of-factly.

"Oh but you so would. You just can't get enough of me. Hey, maybe you can be my gay best friend," he suggested, ducking yet again as this time a roll flew past his head.

"I'm not gay," I growled, looking down. I was sick of all the bullshit people were saying about me today, but this fucking pretty boy mocking me was too much. Nick was pushing me closer to the edge, and I could feel myself slowly falling. _If only he knew_, I thought bitterly. Hell, I might as well be gay. It's not like I'm ever going to be asked out by a guy since I can't dress like a girl. I could probably get a girl to date me since I've got so many that think I'm "hot" but once they found out my secret everything would go to hell. And quite honestly, I have no desire to date a girl anyway. I guess I will always be alone, an outcast in the sea of people. And of course Nick pointed it out today when everyone else was treating me like shit, too. I just couldn't catch a break.

Noticing that Lett's mood had grown worse, Naoki glanced at her from the corner of his eye. Her voice was low and monotone, and all the fight he'd grown to recognize and love was lost. She just sounded…..off. Seeing her head hanging, he immediately wanted to help her; he knew she wouldn't let him. Growing mad and knowing he couldn't do anything about it, Naoki shot a cold glare at Fang, knowing that he was the cause of Scarlett's bad mood. Feeling useless and unable to bear the broken look of Lett, he stood and said to his friends, "I'm tired and I'm gonna go nap somewhere. See you around." Then, turning to Fang, he said, "Well, Fang, I would say it was nice meeting you, but it wasn't." After that, he lazily sauntered through the door leading back into the school, but not before he saw the slight smile on Lett's face. Smiling slightly himself, he couldn't help but feel happy he'd made her smile. After all, he loved her smile.

Despite everything, I smiled at Naoki's words. I really do love him sometimes. Once Naoki was completely gone, I felt his absence and wished I hadn't hurt him. Self-loathing crept into my completely shattered train wreck of emotions and I wanted to apologize to Naoki. Instead, I sat quietly and began to listen to the conversation taking place around me. Everyone was talking to Nick, asking him questions and laughing at his jokes. They all got along with him really well and I could feel resentment rising in me. _Idiot. Why couldn't you have just left me alone like I wanted? Then I wouldn't be feeling like this_, I thought dejectedly.

Just then, Audrey asked, "Hey, can we keep him?"

Everyone laughed at the way she phrased her question except for me. I just continued to stare at the ground, slightly wishing I'd left with Naoki. Please don't do this to me, I silently begged God. I tensely waited for everyone's answer, hoping that someone would say no but somehow knowing that everyone would say yes….and I was right. When everyone had given their answers, I felt all eyes turn to me. "Lett," Audrey asked in a hopeful tone.

I looked up from the ground then and scanned my friends' faces. They all held curiosity as to what my answer would be, but they also held other things. Looking at Adrian I saw that he was ecstatic to have made a new friend; Nori looked happy and I was surprised that he'd warmed up to Nick so quickly; Nyx seemed calm like always but wore a slight smile; and then there was Audrey, filled with hope and joy and excitement. She wanted him here; all of my friends did. I couldn't tell them no; I couldn't hurt them by taking away their new friend even though it would hurt me having him there, and so I shrugged in defeat, mumbling, "I don't care. He can stay." And I couldn't have been telling a bigger lie.

**Wow… I did not see this chapter going like this. I guess that's what happens when I'm in a shitty mood and I write. I'm really unhappy with this chapter, but I'm currently unhappy in general so I guess that's not saying much. Well, I hope you enjoyed reading this! Don't forget to favorite, follow, and review!**

**-Scarlett **


	5. Chapter 5

**Alright so I'm in a terrible mood and I'm highly depressed so I decided to write a chapter, hoping to vent all of my emotions. Sorry if this chapter is weird, but it's kinda about me and what I'm feeling right now so I hope you don't mind….. Anyway, enjoy!**

The rest of my day sucked. All through periods five and six, I heard rumors about the cool, sexy new guy and it was driving me mad. Why was Nick so special? So he called himself Fang and maybe he came from Nevada, but how did that make him so much better than everyone else- so much better than me? He wasn't exactly nice to everyone and he was annoying as all hell, yet he already had a fan club and girls throwing themselves at him and guys begging him to hang out. And that just wasn't fair.

Just then, the bell to signal the end of sixth period rang and I lifted my head from my desk, lazily glancing around and wishing I were asleep. I hadn't taken my usual nap because Nick had requested a seat near me (I'm still pissed about that) and he took that as the opportunity to drive me insane. Standing and stretching, I grabbed my bag and halfheartedly tossed it over my shoulder, glancing behind me with the assumption Nick would be following. To my disappointment, he was. Rolling my eyes and sighing, I sauntered out of the room, letting him follow me but refusing to complain. I would not give him any more leverage over me. He was already too good at pissing me off and I really, really couldn't get in a fight with him because then not only would Principal Reynolds be pissed, but my friends would be, too.

I exited my English class and walked through the halls, ignoring the other students and the boy following me, rushing to find my locker and hoping to leave campus before I could think too much about the pain slamming itself into my already fucked up heart. I quickly opened my locker and threw my books haphazardly inside, then slammed the door closed with a sharp _crack_. From the corner of my eye, I noticed that Nick opened his mouth as though he was about to say something, and I turned away to continue my escape from the hellish thing known as school before he could say anything. However, Nick isn't that easily shut up, and so he whined, "Lettie, why are you so quiet? You haven't even said a word to me since lunch. I miss hearing your evil, mocking voice."

I ignored the comment and exited the school building, picking up the pace and hoping that Nick would decide to leave me alone. I should've known by then that that was too good to be true. Grabbing my arm and halting me, Nick turned me to face him. "Are you okay," he asked, almost managing to sound concerned for me.

For the first time since that morning, I made the effort of meeting his gaze. His eyes were extremely dark, each one an obsidian orb holding its own galaxy, and it was impossible for me to tell what he was thinking. Hating not knowing if he was sincere or not, I just brushed off his question with a shrug, looking at the ground so that my bangs hid my eyes. I heard Nick sigh, and felt his hand release my shoulder. Figuring he'd given up on me, I tried to turn, but was stopped yet again by his hand.

"Did I do something to upset you? Because if I did, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…."

I cut him off mid-sentence with a sharp glare. "Are you kidding me," I hissed. "You've done nothing but irritate me all day and you really want to know if you upset me!? What do you think, Einstein? Do I seem pissed to you?" I heard the anger and resentment in my own voice, and I knew that he could hear it, too. I almost felt bad, knowing that he wasn't the full reason I was angry and hurt, yet I was taking it out on him. He changed my mind really quick.

Glaring, he spat, "You know what? I don't need this. I was just trying to be nice! I haven't done shit to you and if you can't see that then you might want to wipe the crap out of your eyes and learn to be a fucking decent person before you try to talk to me again!"

My anger spiked, and I yelled, "Before _I _try to talk to _you_ again!? You're kidding, right? You'd always done something to irritate me or tease me and I was retaliating! I never once talked to you because I thought that it would be fun! I never even wanted you to talk to me! So why don't you wipe the crap out of _your_ eyes and see that I didn't want this!"

Nick looked furious and yelled, "Well I'm sorry for trying to be your friend! I figured you could use one since everyone keeps talking about how you're such an ass. I guess they're right though; you are an ass and you are different than everyone else. I feel sorry for your friends. They deserve better than this." And then he was gone, storming off to God knows where.

I stood there, shocked and unable to breathe correctly. The lump in my throat had come back, choking me. Refusing to cry and not allowing myself to focus on what I was feeling, I turned towards Martha's. I numbly started the walk there, not seeing or hearing anything other than the replay of Nick's words. _You are an ass and you are different than everyone else. I feel sorry for your friends. They deserve better than this. Sorry for trying to be your friend._ Closing my eyes and breathing deep, I told my inner self to shut up. I didn't want to hear this anymore; I didn't want to hurt anymore.

After a passage of time that could have been an eternity or seconds, I found myself staring at Martha's door, and I shook my head dazedly, forcing myself to focus. Entering the diner, I found that it was relatively empty. I realized then that I was almost an hour early to work and that I was supposed to meet Audrey and Adrian at their house before coming to work. Oops. Ignoring the nagging of my conscience, I walked behind the bar and put on my apron, tying it loosely over my jeans and leaning idly against the countertop.

I don't know how long I had been standing there before I realized that a customer had asked me something. Shaking my head, I quickly mumbled, "Um, I'm sorry but can you please repeat that? I didn't catch it."

The customer, who was a blond girl that appeared to be about my age, sighed dramatically before whining, "I _said_ that I would like a table for two. My boyfriend will be here in a few minutes so will you please, like, do your job and hurry?"

Arching an eyebrow, I simply nodded, mumbling another apology before grabbing a menu and leading Bitch-zilla to an empty table. I then took her drink order and walked into the kitchen.

When Sue saw me, her expression immediately became one of surprise. "Lett, what are you doing here? You said you'd be in at five! It's not even four yet! Are you planning on taking a short day," she asked, sounding a little too hopeful on the last part.

I shook my head. "Nah, I just didn't have anything to do and I know how you're always short staffed in between four and five so I just decided I'd work extra today. That's not a problem, right," I asked, hoping my voice didn't sound as hollow to Sue as it did to my own ears. My hope was fulfilled.

Sue smiled, saying gently, "Of course not. You know I love your company. I practically raised you, Lett. But I don't want you overworking yourself. I can always pay for your food….."

I cut her off before she could finish, knowing where she was planning on taking our conversation. "Grams, I've told you a thousand times that I can take care of myself and my father. I have a job and I earn money and there is no reason you should have to pay for me. Alright?"

Sue sighed, knowing full well that once I'd made up my mind it was pointless to argue with me. But she also knew that I hated it when she was sad, and she played that part well when she needed to. "Alright," she mumbled dejectedly. "But I love you and I love paying for your things! When was the last time you got new clothes? Or when was the last time you had Starbucks? I know you can't get those things with the salary you make. And it makes me so sad to see you go without."

I looked away from Sue, unable to bear the look on her face, whether it was forced or not. I knew that some part of her really was sad at the fact that I wouldn't let her take care of me, but I also knew that part of it was a show to get her way. She wanted me to cave and let her get me nice, expensive things. But I always told her no. And so this was a normal argument, so to speak. Sighing, I said, "Grams, I need a glass of Diet Coke. A customer asked for it a while back. Can you get it for me? We can finish this conversation later."

Once I had the Coke in hand, I walked back into the main part of the diner and saw a boy with brown hair sitting across from Bitch-zilla. Walking over to the table, I put on my waitressing smile and asked Boyfriend, "And what would you like to drink today?"

Before Boyfriend could answer, Bitch-zilla said in her rude and irritating voice, "This isn't diet. I specifically asked for Diet Coke. God, can't you get anything right?"

I grit my teeth, forcing my smile to stick. "My apologies, mam. I'll replace it immediately. What would you like to drink?"

"Did you just call me mam," Bitch-zilla hissed in what I assumed was supposed to be her menacing voice. Rolling my eyes, I said, "Oh, I'm sorry. Now are you going to let your boyfriend order or do you plan on interrupting him every time? I have other customers, you know."

Bitch-zilla's eyes widened and I could tell she wanted to scream something at me, but her boyfriend hurriedly stumbled out, "I'll have a Coke. Thanks."

I smiled at the evil glare I got from Bitch-zilla and nodded, picking up her glass and going to get another. The rest of my time went like that. I had enough customers to keep myself distracted and to keep the pain and memories at bay. Bitch-zilla and Boyfriend left after about two hours and they were my only irritating customers, which was kind of nice.

At around eight thirty, Sue told me to leave. I refused, telling her I needed the extra cash and that I didn't want to go home and deal with my drunk father. Sue eventually relented and let me stay. I worked until the diner closed at nine, and as I was wiping down my last table for the night, Sue came from the kitchen with a platter of food in her hands. "I expect all of this to be eaten before you leave. And while you're eating we can finish our talk."

I grimaced (making sure that Sue couldn't see of course) and then sat down at the bar, throwing my cleaning rag onto the counter. I had a plate of grilled chicken and mashed potatoes in front of me, and the thought of actually eating any of it filled me with the desire to vomit. I took a bite anyway. "So what do you wanna talk about again," I asked casually, pretending to ignore the nausea eating my stomach.

"Lett, I know you're strong and independent. You don't like to rely on people and you feel like you have to do everything on your own. I respect and understand that, but I think you should let me help you. I know that you don't want to be a 'burden' to me, but sweetheart, you aren't one. I love you like you are my own, and I really do hate to see you go without…."

"Grams, I know you love me, I do. But I just can't accept your help. I… I've grown used to doing things on my own. I've been taking care of myself since I was eight. And I just can't break the habit. And I don't go without! I just don't have as much as other students. But it's because I don't want things. Not because I can't have them," I lied, trying to sound casually tired.

"I know you've been taking care of yourself since you were eight. But do you really think I'm stupid, Lett? I know that you want things. And I know that you don't get them. I also know that you act better than you are, just like I know you don't tell me things. It's not healthy, hun. If your mother were here, she wouldn't want you to be this way…."

"But she's not here," I snapped. "She hasn't been here for years, Grams." At the hurt look on her face, I softened my tone. "Look, I'm sorry. I know I'm not exactly something to be proud of, but I think I'm doing pretty damn well for myself. And I'm sorry if you think that I haven't been telling you things, but I don't tell anyone anything. I like to keep things to myself. There's no point in me telling people when it doesn't change anything…."

Sue suddenly became mad, saying sharply, "It could change everything! You need to tell people things, Lett! You need to trust someone! I don't care if it's me or one of your friends or some random stranger, but you need to talk to someone! I'm tired of watching you make yourself miserable! You're ruining your life and I'm sick of allowing you to do it! Have an opinion! Spend time with your friends! Buy something for yourself! Act immature! Do something rash and stupid! Hell, do _something_! Be somebody, Lett! You can't just be the high school badass for the rest of your life, and if you're planning on it then you're right, you aren't something to be proud of! But Jesus, will you please let someone help you out of the hole you dug yourself because I'm tired of trying to get you out of it!"

I sat frozen, completely still as Sue tore me to shreds with her words. Each one was a tiny dagger, and every time she threw one at me, it hit closer to its mark. When she was finally done, she huffed out, "Well?"

I looked up at her, my face completely blank, and mumbled, "Well what?"

Sue grit her teeth, slamming her fist on the countertop in frustration. "You know what? I give up! Do what you want, Lett. I'm done trying to help you when you're obviously hell-bent on destroying your life. When you end up alone, remember that it's your fault."

I forced myself not to flinch at her cold words, and then, when she had been quiet for a few moments, I asked quietly, "Are you done, or can you think of more ways to make me feel like shit?"

Sue didn't say anything. She just pointed to the door. I nodded before turning and walking out into the night. The walk to my apartment had never seemed so long and I had never before felt so utterly alone. Sue had always been there for me, and now that she had thrown me out like the mutt that I am, I was terrified. Fear and pain gripped my heart, their cold hands making my chest ache and breathing difficult. Cold air tore through the thin fabric of my t-shirt and I shivered, picking up my pace as I wanted to be anywhere but on the streets alone.

I had never been so glad to reach my apartment. The night was cold and sinister, and my day had been long and cruel. Fumbling with my keys in the darkness, I unlocked the door and stepped into the slightly-warmer-than-outside apartment, and I was immediately pinned against the wall with hands around my throat. After a moment, they released me and I tumbled to the floor, retching and coughing. "What the hell," I gasped, looking up at the angry, inebriated face of my father.

Snarling, he kicked me hard in the ribs, and I coughed some more, hating the sickening _thunk_ that his kick elicited. "Don't talk back to me you little brat," my father growled threateningly. "And where the hell have you been? I thought you were supposed to be home before me every night?"

Looking up, I rasped out sarcastically, "Yeah, well most nights you're not home this early so I figure I can have some fun before you get home. Oops. Guess I was wrong." My father didn't find my sarcasm amusing. He kicked me in the ribs again, and I couldn't breathe. Fire tore through my insides and I felt like vomiting up the food Sue had forced me to eat. Crawling forward as I tried to breathe, I was taken off guard by my father's sudden decision to slap me. My skin stung as his hand connected with a solid _crack_. My head jerked to the side and I tasted the sharp, metallic tang of blood. Refusing to wince or grimace, I looked up at my father again, knowing full well that he wasn't finished with me yet.

"Think you're funny, mutt? Well I've got news for you- you aren't. Oh, and about that little stunt you pulled this morning- what do you think that was," he asked casually, fully enjoying the knowledge that I was in massive pain and probably unable to breathe.

"What do you think, jack-" Before I could finish my sentence, he kicked me again. I fell onto my stomach, my arms unable to hold my weight as I gagged and choked on air. I lay on the floor for a moment before I felt a hand yank me up by my hair. I bit my tongue to keep from crying out in pain, and then my head was slammed into the wall. My vision immediately became cloudy and blurred, almost as though I were trying to see in dark, murky water. Black spots danced in front of my eyes and my ears rang. I think I felt something warm and wet trickling down my check- probably my blood.

My father slammed my head into the wall one more time, cackling as he released my hair and I fell limply to the ground. After about a minute my vision cleared enough for me to see the sadistic smile on my father's face as he held something in his hands. Still unable to focus completely, I couldn't make out what the object was. When he crouched in front of me and whispered, "Let's play a game," I tensed, knowing exactly what he meant.

He yanked me to my feet by my hair and shoved me into the wall. Around me, the world spun and tilted at sickening angles as I tried to keep myself upright. When I stumbled, I felt the familiar sting of my father's leather belt as it bit into my skin. He hit me about ten times, stopping when I fell to my knees because I was unable to stand. My legs stung and shook, and I knew that they were covered in angry red welts, if not bleeding. Seeming satisfied, my father said, "Well, I guess you won't screw with me anymore. It's too bad you didn't cry, though. I really should work on that. You used to whimper and sob. Now you don't even wince."

I gave him a disgusted look and spit blood onto his shoes. "Bastard," I choked out, wiping the blood from my split lip with the back of my hand.

"You little whore," he hissed angrily. Grabbing me by my throat, my father lifted me and shoved me into the wall, where I hung with my feet about three inches off the ground. Gripping at his hands and trying to pull them off, I weakly kicked my legs. He didn't let me go. My vision became blurry yet again as my body screamed for oxygen. When he finally dropped me, I inhaled sharply through my mouth, grasping my throat and wheezing.

As my father stormed out of the house with a threat yelled over his shoulder, I knew that my beating for the night was done. I lay on my side on the cold cement of the apartment, and everything in me ached. I hadn't had a beating like this in quite a while…..

Shivering into the freezing floor, I coughed, seeing little spatters of red on the concrete. Forcing myself to sit up so that I could try and evaluate the damage, I cried out in agony. I felt as though a knife were lodged in my ribs. I vaguely wondered if my father had actually cracked one this time. Looking at my hands and arms, I noticed that they had come out almost unscathed save for a few bruises. Knowing that I needed to clean the blood from my face, I crawled over to a nearby table, biting my lip to stop the cry of pain, and pulled myself into a standing position.

Inhaling sharply, I allowed myself a moment to prepare for the painful walk ahead. Then I stumbled to the bathroom, somehow managing to open the door. I flipped on the light and fell quickly onto my knees, gagging and vomiting blood and my dinner into the toilet. Once my stomach had been emptied, I stood once more and looked into the mirror.

My father had done a good job tonight. My lip was split and bleeding and the side of my face was somewhere between purple and black from coming into contact with a wall. There was a cut on top of the huge bruise and I had a bloody nose as well. Lifting my shirt, I saw angry purple boot marks on my skin. Gritting my teeth, I forced myself to push down on my ribs, feeling for any cracks or fractures. There were none. The last thing I checked was my legs, and they were covered in welts and cuts.

I quickly cleaned my wounds and then stumbled into my room, gingerly changing into pajamas. As I lay down, unable to breathe normally and in the total agony of someone who has been beat to the point of internal bleeding, the tears that I had been holding in all day finally escaped my barriers eyes. I gave up on holding them back and just let them flow freely, hating the sting of pain that they brought as they slid over my open wounds. The events of the day played in slow motion and I felt like my heart was being stabbed. Despair, anger, pain, sadness, and regret all slithered through my heart like a cold, venomous serpent and its poison was deadly.

All of the words and arguments came flooding in and out of perspective, sometimes clear and other times not. The words and syllables blurred together in one confusing jumble, tearing through my thoughts like a tornado, destroying my mind. My vision was blurred and fading black, and the memories wouldn't stop playing like some morbid movie. All of the things I'd been told over the past twenty four hours pulled and tugged at me, sometimes making me angry but mostly making me sad. How could I be angry if they were right? I am ruining my life and I am going to end up alone. And I am a mutt. I'm useless and stupid and I'm a failure. I know it and my friends and family know it, too. Agony and searing pain wrestled with my body as my eyes tried to close. I bitterly thought of my father and how much I hate him for doing this, how much I hate him beating me. And how much I hate knowing that I deserve it.

**Wow this is a long chapter…..and now that I'm reading it, it's actually pretty messed up. I guess this is what happens when I write when I'm depressed. Hmm…interesting. Well, I hope you didn't find this chapter too terrible and don't forget to favorite, follow and review!**

**-Scarlett**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi again. So I'm still in a really bad mood and I'm still depressed, but I decided that I'd write anyway. This chapter is kinda boring and not very well-written (it was about 1 in the morning when I wrote it), but I hope you enjoy it anyway!**

I slid into consciousness with my eyes still closed and sleep tugging at my body. Realizing that my phone alarm had woken me up, I pulled my arm from under my blankets, feeling goose bumps rise from the cool air. Feeling around for my phone, I fumbled and eventually shut it off. Groggily opening my eyes and letting them adjust to the dim, melancholy gray light of my room, I felt the aching pain of the millions of bruises covering my body. Thinking, I realized that today was Friday and I technically had school.

Thudding grumpily down onto my old, grimy mattress, I let my eyes slide closed again, reveling in the welcome silence and calming tranquility of the early morning. Outside, I heard cars honking and people yelling, but it all felt distant and I couldn't bring myself to care. Rolling over, I grimaced at the feelings shooting up and down my body. After a few moments of trying to get comfortable and having no success, I decided that I would get up and brush my teeth, maybe even get breakfast and go to school.

Sliding my legs out of bed and wincing at the cold cement on my bare feet, I debated allowing myself to go back to sleep. I decided against it. Stiffly forcing myself into a standing position, I clenched my jaw and rigidly walked into the bathroom. If I thought my body hurt last night, it hurt ten times worse now. My bones ached, my head throbbed, my chest hurt, and my lungs felt like they would explode with each breath. My stomach seemed to be torn between the feelings of hunger and being sawed open, and I really couldn't decide which it was. Reaching the bathroom, I did my usual routine, except about twenty times slower. Coughing and wheezing, I felt my chest constrict and fought back tears as pain ricocheted through me. When my coughing fit had ended and I was standing in front of my enemy the mirror once again, I saw how ugly my face looked.

The cuts I had cleaned were scabbing over a gross brown color and a few were still trickling small amounts of blood. The bruise where my face had met the wall had made up its mind and decided to turn a dark violet purple, making my other skin seem sallow and faded in comparison. My split lip was swollen and cracked, bleeding slightly, and a bruise danced across the bridge of my nose. Wincing, I looked away from my distorted reflection and limped back to my room. Reaching my bed, I crawled into its welcoming arms, letting the blankets embrace me and envelop my shivering body in warmth.

Allowing my eyes to slide closed again, I thought about whether or not I should attend school. Sitting up hurt and made breathing difficult, and my head felt like it was being stabbed repeatedly while being danced on by elephants. Nausea rocked my body whenever I moved too fast and I had no idea how I would I explain my appearance to everyone. I'd never been to school looking this terrible before.

If I didn't go, my friends would freak and my phone would blow up. I'd have a bunch of make-up work and I'd have to deal with the lovely and evil Mr. Reynolds. Sue (if she wasn't still pissed and ignoring me) would be extremely disappointed and mad, and once my father found out (if he found out) I would be murdered. Awesome.

Opening my eyes again, I decided that I wouldn't be going to school. I could barely function and my body felt about ready to shut down, so murder or not, I was keeping my happy ass at home. I would tell my friends I'd come down with the flu when they asked and I'd tell Reynolds where to shove it if he messed with me. I was used to the beatings and honestly couldn't care less if I had another one, and since there was a slight chance my father wouldn't realize I'd ditched, I decided I was fine on that front. I could deal with a little extra homework on Monday and I figured Sue was going to remain pissed and disappointed for a long time, so I didn't have anything to lose there, either. Cringing at the memory of Sue, I suddenly decided that my stomach was hungry and sought out the distraction of preparing myself food.

Standing yet again, I stumbled down the hall to the kitchen. At the front of the hall, I hesitated a moment and looked for signs of my father; he wasn't home. Smiling in relief and grimacing at the blood it caused to drip from my lip, I hobbled to the kitchen cabinet and scanned for food. Nothing caught my attention as particularly appetizing so I decided to raid the fridge instead. Opening the door, I was highly disappointed. The fridge was nearly bare save for a large amount of beer for my father and some old pizza that had turned green. Gross.

Disgusted by the food in the fridge and knowing that there was nothing in the freezer, I went back to the cabinet. Looking at my options, I decided that I needed to go grocery shopping and grabbed a container of Yaki Soba since shopping was out of the question. Quickly preparing it, I popped it in the microwave for four minutes and slouched against the counter as I waited for it to cook. Staring off into space, I zoned out and was lost in my thoughts. The ding of the microwave startled me and I opened the door, slightly nauseated at the smell of the noodles. _You have to eat,_ I told myself crossly. _You need food to heal._

Adding the spice packet to the noodles and throwing away the vegetables (no one sane eats that crap anyway), I stirred my makeshift meal with a fork and sat down at my table. Looking disdainfully at the seasoned noodles and trying to ignore the unhappy flips my stomach was doing at the thought of eating food, I scooped up a bite and forced myself to swallow. The noodles tasted good, but as they slid down my throat I could feel my body retaliating, as if it were saying _Don't feed me idiot! I don't need food!_

After an agonizingly long amount of time, I finished all of the Yaki Soba and threw away the dish, limping back to my room. About halfway there, my stomach heaved and I knew I was going to be sick. Rushing to the bathroom and cursing the aching moans of my body, I fell to my knees by the toilet and vomited up Yaki Soba and blood. Gagging at the awful smell and hating the horrible taste in my mouth, I crawled away from the toilet and flushed the evidence of my weakness down the drain. Brushing my teeth again, I noticed that I had throw up in my hair and turned on the water for a shower.

I returned to my room to grab a change of clothes and check the time, and then walked into the bathroom again. Steam was coming from behind the shower curtain and I gingerly stepped into the tub, sighing in absolute content as I let the wonderfully warm water beat down on my sore body. Feeling my muscles relax, I closed my eyes in pleasure from the comforting feeling. Humming a slight tune, I washed my short, choppy hair and scrubbed my skin, hoping to remove some of the dirt, grime, and blood.

When I had finished, I stepped into the cold air of my apartment once more. Sliding on baggy sweats and a tank top, I dried my hair with my towel as I walked back into my room. Discarding the towel and trying to ignore the return of the ache, I grabbed my iPod and returned to my bed. Plugging in my headphones, I tuned out the rest of the world and allowed myself to zone out and become part of the music; to get devoured by the beat.

Lying on my side, I idly played with the chord of my headphones, quietly humming the tune of Fake It by Seether. Eventually, the ache in my body became a distant throb and my vision blurred as my eyes slid closed…

…

A seven year old version of Scarlett sighed quietly as she followed her mother and father into a large, extravagant building. The little white dress she wore flowed around her like velvet water and danced with her brisk walk. Her hair was long and in perfect ringlets, cascading down her shoulders in a way that made other girls stare with envy. Her eyes were large and pretty, long lashes framing her oceanic orbs. She swayed lightly and had a graceful ease about her that was quite odd, especially considering that she was wearing the death trap known as heels. In front of her, her mother and father were whispering amongst themselves and only stopped for a brief moment when her mother called sharply, "Scarlett, _hurry!"_

Flinching at the tone of her mother's voice and rushing forward, the young girl tried to keep a cool manner about her as she nearly ran to keep up with her parents. Her mother had given her a very strict set of rules to follow regarding her rich grandmother's expensive party, and Lett knew that if she ruined anything, her mother and father would be livid. Lett had no desire to be at the party, of course, and she didn't particularly care for the distasteful woman that was her grandmother, either, but her parents had been adamant that she go with them and so there she was, stuck in a stupid dress and chasing after them like a dog.

When they reached the front door of the grand house, a man in a suit opened the door for them and Lett's mother grabbed her arm, forcing her to her side with a fake smile. "Why thank you. Come on Scarlett, darling. We don't want to make your grandmother wait for us any longer. We're already late!" With that said, she pulled her daughter forcefully through the door and down a long hall to a large dining room.

Everything in the room screamed _rich_ to Scarlett, but of course, her grandmother had always loved to show off her money. All around her, people wore extravagant clothes and danced on the makeshift ballroom's floor. Waiters in tuxes strolled past carrying little silver platters with food that was probably French and had some long name that sounded about as good as it tasted and scattered about the room were tables for people to sit at. Alcohol was being served everywhere, and there was some to fill everyone's preferences, anywhere from red wine to cognac to Budweiser.

All of this was taken in in the brief second that Scarlett had first entered the room, and then she was tugged in the direction of a large table. There were about eight seats around it, and sitting at the head of the table was a laughing woman. All around her, ladies and gentlemen laughed and fawned over her, and Lett couldn't fight the disgust boiling in her stomach at the sight of her grandmother.

It wasn't that her grandmother was mean, and it certainly wasn't that she was ugly. In fact, Scarlett's grandmother was far from both. Her skin glowed with youth that belied her age and her hair, which was actually a similar color to Lett's, was long and beautiful. Regal features graced her grandmother's face, and her brilliant green eyes that matched those of Lett's mother shone and glistened with emotions- easy to read but impossible to decipher. Honestly, her grandmother could have been a queen. She had the personality and livelihood to do so, and if it weren't for the fact that she had not a drop of royal blood in her, Lett was positive that she would have done so in a heartbeat.

So, no, it wasn't her grandmother's looks or personality that made Lett hate her. It was her expectations. From day one, Lett's grandmother had decided that Lett was going to be the perfect lady and a wonderful object to show off to her friends. That was all well and good, of course, until Lett became old enough to have an opinion and to decide that she hated the rich lifestyle her grandmother expected her to please. Once that happened, all her grandmother could do was criticize the way Lett acted and the way her parents raised her, and nothing Lett did or could do was possibly good enough and everything she said was wrong. Her opinion was deemed stupid and unacceptable, and it had become a game of sorts for her grandmother to hide her contempt for her granddaughter while her friends were there.

Now, as Lett and her parents walked towards said woman, she had to bite her tongue to keep from saying things that would really get her in trouble. Forcing a polite smile onto her face when she reached the group of people, she bowed slightly and murmured sweetly, "Hello everyone. Grandmother."

Her grandmother smiled grandly, opening her arms and saying, "Well I'm glad you could make it sweetheart! How is my favorite granddaughter? Fashionably late as always, I suppose." Lett didn't miss the attack behind the seemingly harmless comment.

Lett simply nodded, letting her parents do the talking, as her mother had instructed her to do. Zoning out as the conversation was highly boring and wishing she were anywhere but at the party, Lett vaguely heard her mother say, "Lett, darling, why don't you go play with Emma's little boy? He's about your age."

Looking at her mother as her eyes focused, Scarlett understood that it wasn't a suggestion but an order. Nodding, she walked into the crowd of dancing and laughing people, fighting the urge to run. Getting bumped and jostled, she heard people whispering around her. _Isn't that Elizabeth's granddaughter? What is that little creature? She seems positively perfect! She's pretty for a girl so young. I wonder if she comes here often? She definitely has Elizabeth's blood in her veins. Just look at the hair! _Pretending not to notice, Lett finally reached Emma's boy, finding him where he always was at these parties- far in the corner, out of reach of everyone.

Glaring at everyone who passed, he saw her approaching and his face softened a little. He was a year older than Scarlett, with bright red hair that was unkempt and slightly long, blue eyes staring from the fringe of his bangs. A slight smirk plastered itself on his face, and he said, "Well if it isn't little miss perfect. What're you doing over here with the trash like me?"

Scarlett shook her head, smiling ruefully, "Sorry to bother you Pierce. I promise I won't talk if you let me hide with you. I'm sick of my grandmother." It wasn't the exact reason Lett was there, but it was the truth nonetheless.

Pierce shook his head. "You're not bothering me. You know you're my favorite person at these things. Lighten up a bit, Lett."

She smiled a little and sat next to him, both of them talking about insignificant things and avoiding topics that were too personal to explore. Lett and Pierce had this odd understanding- he and she were friends but they never talked about anything having to do with their families. They could talk about the weather or their friends or school, but never anything at home. And they both liked it that way.

After a while of talking, they both fell silent. That's what normally happened. One of them ran out of ideas to start conversation and so they became quiet and tortured themselves with their thoughts. However, that night, Pierce said, "Hey, come with me. I wanna show you something."

Curious, Lett grabbed his hand and let him lead her to a set of doors. Glancing around cautiously, he quickly slid the doors open and hissed, "Hurry or we'll get caught," as Lett slipped through. Following behind her and grabbing her hand again, Pierce led Lett through the garden of her grandmother's house. The rose maze cast shadows and soon enough, the large house was far enough away that its light didn't illuminate the path.

"Pierce, you better not get us lost," she hissed in the darkness.

"I won't, I won't. Alright, don't freak but I'm going to let go of your hand for a little bit while I go and check something. I'll be right back."

Before Scarlett could stop him, Pierce dropped her hand and scurried away. "Pierce," Scarlett said sharply. "Damn you! Don't leave me here alone!"

There was no response and Lett became slightly frantic at the thought of being lost in the dark rose maze by herself. Just then, Pierce returned, wearing a Cheshire grin as he said, "Calm down, princess. I wouldn't ever leave you alone. Now c'mon. I want you to see this."

Taking his hand, Lett was led into a clearing that was surrounded by rose bushes covered in blooming white roses. White tea lights covered the bushes, casting a small amount of light in the clearing. In the center, there was a beautiful koi pond where fireflies danced on the surface of the water and the fish swam sluggishly below.

Eyes wide, Lett gasped. "It's beautiful," she said, turning to Pierce with a wide smile on her face. The older boy felt accomplished, proud that he'd made his friend smile for real. Lett dropped his hand and ran forward, kneeling near the pond, and Pierce watched her, captivated by the beautiful girl. The two played in the clearing for a while, laughing and talking. Eventually, they returned to the house, and the happiness and enchantment was gone.

Before Lett could enter the house, Pierce grabbed her hand again and said, "Thanks for coming with me. That was the only fun I've had all night."

Scarlett only smiled and nodded before slipping back inside. She didn't miss the scandalized whispers about her and Pierce, but she chose to ignore them, not wanting anything to destroy her mood. When she reached her parents and grandmother, she simply sat down again, nodding politely when necessary. Then, one of the women asked, "So Lett, what do you think of Pierce? He's quite the handsome young man isn't he?" 

Lett, not sure how to respond since this hadn't appeared in her rules, decided to answer in a flattering way. "Yes, I believe he is. We're very close, the two of us, and I consider him to be a great friend."

The woman smiled and giggled with her friends, clearly excited to have some new gossip. Lett didn't miss the furious look on her grandmother's face. She quickly smoothed away the rage, calmly saying, "I believe that Scarlett and I need to have a talk."

Suddenly terrified, she looked for Pierce in the crowd. He caught her gaze and saw her distress, but before he could get to her, Lett's grandmother had a firm grip on Lett's arm and was dragging her away.

The two of them walked out into the garden and her grandmother let go of her as soon as she was positive that no one would see the disgusted way she did so. Turning to face her granddaughter, she said, "What do you think you're doing, complimenting that wretched boy?"

"I thought that in those sorts of situations I am supposed to say what is polite. I didn't realize that that didn't apply to my friend," she replied, tone civil.

"That boy is a Trueblood and going to hell with the rest of his family. You are not to do anything other than play nice with him. He is nothing to you and he is certainly not handsome. You have an image to uphold, and I won't have you ruining this family, understand that rat?"

Scarlett bit her lip, a habit that she knew her grandmother hated, and muttered, "That boy has a name and is my friend. And I don't want this image you've created for me."

Her grandmother smiled. "Well, mutt, you've got it. You see all of those people in there," she asked, gesturing to the building. "All of them believe that you're beautiful and smart and talented. You and I both know that you are none of those things, but I've painted that image to them and made you play the part so well that they believe it. If you start fraternizing with that boy, that image will begin to fade and everyone will see who you really are. And that can't happen."

Scarlett flinched, feeling hurt by her grandmother's scorn. "I'm not some picture. I'm real and I have a voice. And there's nothing wrong with that." Even to her own ears, Scarlett sounded unsure.

"You aren't a picture. You're a doll. And your mine. I dress you up and make you look nice, but at the end of the day, I lock you away and hide you from the world because there's nothing special about you when I'm not the one pulling your strings and making you play. You have no voice, and you have no will. And you're only interesting because _I _make you so, do you understand?"

"I'm not a doll. I'm real. I have feelings. And you don't make me anything but fake! A useless little toy!"

Her grandmother laughed. "I can't make you what you already are. I didn't make you useless; you were born that way. I'm just trying to mislead people into believing something other than the truth. Honestly, you should thank me!"

Scarlett fought back tears. "I wasn't born useless! I'm not bad! I-I'm not a mutt! And just because you can't see that doesn't mean that everyone else can't."

"Scarlett, if it weren't for me you'd be sitting in a corner like the Trueblood boy. Now, I'm through with this conversation and we're going back to the party. I'm going to help you fix your mistake."

Lett shook her head. "It wasn't a mistake! Pierce is my friend and we are close! I won't change that."

Her grandmother sighed, rolling her eyes irritably. "I'm not asking you to change that. I don't care if a mutt like you spends time with a rat like him. I just don't want you to spend time with him while my friends are around. They're important people, and image is everything. All I'm asking you to do is play the part of the uninterested girl who is just being polite, then, after the party, you two can go roll in mud for all I care."

Gritting her teeth, Lett said, "And what if I don't do that? What if I still spend time with Pierce?"

"Then you won't see him again. Now let's go." With that, she forcefully grabbed Lett's arm and hauled her into the ballroom. Lett's eyes were wide and she suddenly wanted to find Pierce and tell him everything. She knew it was against their rules, but she didn't care anymore. She was terrified of losing her friend.

Her grandmother gave her arm one harsh pull before leaning down and hissing in Lett's ear, "_Fake it." _With that, she and Lett re-entered the grand room, people still laughing and drinking and smiling. And Scarlett pretended to be one of them, and pretended not to realize the boy with red hair in the corner, looking at her like he had been betrayed.

…..

My eyes shot open and I found my iPod dead in my hand. Feeling sick and reeling from the memories swirling through my head, I tried to force Pierce and my grandmother from my mind. _Damn memory_, I thought bitterly, wishing I could have a normal dream for once instead of reliving my past.

Sitting up, I realized for the first time that my cheeks were wet; I had cried in my sleep. It was then that I remembered what it felt like to be a failure and a rat, imperfect in every way, and hated by your own family. I hadn't seen Pierce in years and my grandmother had disowned me once my mother was gone, and it was suddenly a painful reminder that I would never be good enough; I would never succeed. But, oh, how I wish I could.

**What did you think of this chapter? Was it good? And what do you think of her grandmother? She's a bitch right? Favorite, follow, and review please! I'd really like some feedback! **

**-Scarlett**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi again my peoples ^^ Ok so I've kinda been slacking off on writing recently but its only cuz my life is hellish and complicated and I seriously hate it sometimes. However, I'm in an uber good mood today and missed writing for all of you lovely people so I decided to finish chapter seven. Enjoy!**

I was lying on my bed, idly doodling while the thrum of the city lulled me into a lazy, half-awake state. It was Sunday and warm, bright white sunlight casting a square of heat on my bed as I was sprawled out in that spot. Tapping my pencil on my teeth, I debated how to fix the picture I was drawing. I had sketched a sloppy forest onto my pad, unsure where to go from there. Did I want to color it, shade it? Maybe use charcoal? I couldn't decide and was on the brink of boredom, my still aching body groaning at the thought of having nothing to do but hating the thought of actually moving. Sighing and picking up my sketchbook and pencil, I shoved them in a drawer in my nightstand before rolling onto my back, staring at the ceiling. Squinting from the light of my window, I held my hand out above my face, examining the way it looked. Pale and small, with long slender fingers. A ring rested on my middle finger, nothing but a plain silver band.

Dropping my hand and unsure of what to do now, I tumbled to my side, staring blankly out my window, letting the light hit my eyes until everything was hazy and blurred, nothing in the correct perspective. I could hear the dull ticking of the clock as it sang its mundane and never ending melody, letting my body drift into a state of stillness and quiet so profound that the clock faded and the city disappeared, my aching body forgot its bruises and still blackened eye, and my eyes were open but could see no real shapes, just opaque colors. My mind idled lazily, thinking but not focusing on one true thought. It was blissfully peaceful.

Ever since my wonderful wakeup call Friday, I've been miserable. Pierce and my grandmother keep dancing through my head, tearing my sanity apart and cutting me open with each jarring memory. However, as I lay on my bed with the sun warming me and cradling my body, I forgot who I was and what was wrenching my heart into knots.

A sudden and timid tapping on my door brought everything reeling back into focus; my pain, memory, sight, and sound returning in a blur of sensation. Blinking my eyes a few times to regain full awareness from my dreamless sleep, I winced a little as I stood, cursing my father for the millionth time since my beating of two days ago. Walking down my hall with silent, careful steps, I peeked into the main room and saw that my father was not there. Not afraid of a sudden beating now that I had seen for myself he wasn't home; I walked to the front door, pausing as I stared at the handle. I cursed myself for being uncertain and hesitant, but part of me feared who was on the other side of my door.

As you can probably guess, I don't exactly like people knowing where I live. Not only because my apartment is a piece of crap that is highly flammable and disgusting, but because I'm not exactly a fan of my beloved daddy and the idea of my friends being here while he was here….well it pretty much scared me shitless. With this in mind, I ran through the possibilities. It could be a slut my father knew, or maybe one of his bar buddies. Audrey and Adrian _might_ have somehow tracked down my address, but it was highly unlikely. The only other person I could think of was my father….but he wouldn't knock.

Tired of psyching myself out and feeling like a wimp, I growled quietly and grabbed the knob of my front door, yanking it open. My vision became spotty and I couldn't see anything after the sudden light, but once it cleared, I saw an eight year old little girl with dark brown and large brown eyes standing on my doorstep. Surprised but pleased to see my favorite girl, I cocked my head, probably looking stupid and confused.

"H-hi Lett," she said as she stared timidly at the ground, her childish voice almost too quiet to hear.

"Hey, Seiko," I said, my voice finally functioning now that I'd pushed away my shock. "What are you doing here?"

"Can I come in? I don't wanna be at home…." She trailed off but I knew exactly what she meant and just nodded my head; her parents were fighting again. Moving out of the way and gesturing through my front door and into the living room, I shut the door as Seiko walked to the small recliner and plopped down with a sigh. I recalled the last time she had been here due to her…..dilemma I guess you'd call it, and how she'd been coming more and more frequently. I watched as she spent some time examining the room and just taking in the dirt and grime coating everything before she finally focused on me. "Is it just me or did it get messier since the last time I was here?"

I tried not to flinch at her unintentionally hurtful words, keeping a straight face and only saying, "I'm never really here and my father normally has run of the house, meaning it's pretty much never cleaned. What do you think?"

She nodded and suddenly dropped her head, refusing to look at me and sitting mutely. "What's wrong, Ko? You know you can tell me anything. Why are you here today? Are they being bad again?"

She glanced up at me uneasily and fidgeted with her shirt uncomfortably, leaning back and biting her lip, a mannerism very similar to my own nervous habit. "U-um, well…."

I knelt down near her, mentally telling my screaming muscles to shut up, and brushed her hair behind her ears. "What, Ko? You know I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong," I prodded gently.

She looked up at me, her mouth opened as if to say something, but her eyes widened and she asked, "What happened to your face?"

Grimacing, I muttered, "Way to avoid the question Ko. But if you must know, I fell…..down a flight of stairs…..at….night?" I finished on a questioning note as I mentally face palmed. Seriously? That was the best I could do? God I'm even more pathetic than I'd originally thought. Seiko probably could've come up with something better than that and she's _eight._

After a slightly long and awkward silence with nothing to fill it but her staring at me, she finally sighed and said with a small and mocking smile, "That's the stupidest excuse you have ever used, and that's saying something considering that you're also the one who said you were mauled by a rabid cat."

I smiled slightly but quickly removed the small grin, yelling playfully, "You weren't even there for that so shut up! It sounded better in my head! And it's not like _you're _any better, Ko! What did you tell me? Wasn't it something along the lines of school being cancelled due to Idiot Observation Day?"

She grinned and laughed her little, tinkling laugh. "Not fair! That was a good reason and you know it!"

I shook my head. "If you're gonna try and ditch school, which I forbid you to do by the way, at least use a real holiday! I mean, Idiot Observation Day? Really? Where did you even come up with that," I asked teasingly.

She scowled defiantly and said, "I came up with it on my own figuring you'd like that holiday and let me ditch."

I chuckled and said, "I do like that holiday and I now officially celebrate it every August 16. But that doesn't mean I'm going to give you slack if you ditch school again."

"Oh, come on! I made up the holiday and I'm not even allowed to celebrate it?"

I smirked evilly. "Nope. Now c'mon kid. Let's go hang out in my room, alight?"

She rolled her eyes and whined at me but I ignored it. Toning her out as I lead her to my room (in case my father showed up early again) I motioned towards my bed. Deciding I was hungry I said quickly, "I'll be right back." I then turned and walked to the kitchen and opened a cupboard, cursing under my breath as I realized that I didn't have anything to feed Seiko or myself. Sighing and grabbing a bottle of water instead of something useful, like, a cookie, I trudged back down the hall.

When I entered my room, I was slightly surprised to find Seiko curled up into a tiny ball, clutching my pillow to her chest as though it were a lifeline. All traces of teasing and happiness were gone. Her large, woeful brown eyes followed my every move as she breathed shakily. I could see that she was fighting tears, and part of me felt guilty that I was terrible at comforting people yet this little girl had faith in me.

"Scoot over," I said gently when I reached my bed. She complied but didn't say anything. I slid into the bed next to her and she immediately wrapped her arms around my waist and had me in a death grip, her face buried in my side, the pillow forgotten. I wrapped my arms around her trembling form and whispered, "Hey. Shh, it's okay. It's alright. I'm here, Ko. I'm here."

She mumbled, "I didn't mean to do this. I wanted to be strong. I'm sorry."

I looked down at her. "What're you apologizing for? There's nothing wrong with you coming here. You were scared. Everyone gets scared sometimes."

She peeked up at me. "Not you. You're never afraid of anything! You can fight and you always know all of these cool, witty comebacks and you're just unscareable."

I chuckled a little. "I am not invincible and I get scared, too. I am human, believe it or not. And if I ever catch you fighting I'll personally kick your ass, do you understand?"

"Aww, but you fight! And you are _so_ not scared of anything!"

"I'm not an eight year old little girl and I'm also not you. And you wanna know the truth," I asked her, looking down with a smile. "I'm terrified of spiders! Those things are just creepy!" With that said, I rolled on top of her, tickling her sides and laughing as she shrieked and giggled.

After she could barely breathe and had tears streaming from both eyes from laughing too hard, I rolled off of her and she punched my arm lightly. "Y-you suck," she panted out. "That wasn't fair."

I smirked. "Life's not fair, Ko. Get over it. Besides, I made you laugh, didn't I? That should count for something."

She smiled despite herself and then I watched as it slipped and finally fell, no traces of happiness left on her young face. Sighing, I asked, "You wanna talk about it?"

Seiko looked up at me and mutely shook her head, the tears she'd been fighting earlier glistening in her eyes. She still refused to cry. Sighing again, I nodded and opened my arms, letting her curl up against me and clench her small, fragile fist in my shirt. Wrapping one arm around her waist and using the other to stroke her hair soothingly, I felt a single wet splotch hit my skin. She was finally crying.

Feeling my heart clench and continuing to quietly play with her silky hair, I was surprised when Seiko's broken voice whispered, "Lett, will you sing me a song?"

Caught off guard and not quite sure I'd heard her correctly, I glanced down at her. "Me? Sing? I'm not any good, but if you want me to then of course I will."

Seiko looked up at me sadly; tears still glistening in her doe eyes and making me feel terrible. "Please, Lett….."

I chewed the inside of my lip, my sadness for Ko gnawing at my insides. I knew I couldn't say no. "What do you want me to sing, Ko?"

"Can you choose? I want something you like. I want something with meaning."

I nodded, thinking a moment before a song popped into my head. Feeling slightly hesitant due to the lyrics but deciding that it was a perfect fit, I looked at Ko. Taking a deep breath and bracing myself for the sound of my voice (which I hate) I quietly sung out, "Sing me to sleep, sing me to sleep, I'm tired and I, I want to go to bed. Sing me to sleep, sing me to sleep and then leave me alone. Don't try to wake me in the morning cause I will be gone, don't feel bad for me, I want you to know, deep in the cell of my heart I will be so glad to go." As I sang, I could feel her relax and begin to breathe easily. She was still and I was still, and the only sound was my low, careful voice singing a song that had so much meaning that I doubted Seiko would catch all of it.

When I had finished about a minute or two later, she looked up at me and her eyes were still sad but held no more tears. "You're really good. You should sing more often. If you didn't have to dress as a boy I bet you could win in talent shows and stuff….."

I shook my head and smiled ruefully. "I'm terrible! I can't sing to save my life. Did you like the song despite my voice?"

She nodded. "It's beautiful…but really sad at the same time. Lett….why did you choose that song?"

I hesitated, not quite sure if I knew the full reason myself. "I don't really know. You asked for something with meaning…..and all of a sudden I knew that I wanted to sing that song. I knew that it was the only song that would fit."

Seiko looked at me curiously despite her sad appearance and then asked quietly, "What does it mean?"

Again, I hesitated. "It reminds me of someone I love…..and of myself," I whispered. "It's part of my memory. It makes me sad. It makes me happy. It reminds me of being alone and forgotten. It depicts my childhood."

Seiko was obviously surprised and I was, too. I hadn't expected that. I hadn't realized what I was thinking of when I sang to her, but now that I did, my head was reeling.

Snapping out of her shock first, Seiko smiled a little tiny bit and hugged me tighter. "Thank you. Thank you for singing to me and giving me meaning. My….my mother never will. I've always wondered what it felt like…"

I sat, frozen in shock. My heart ached for the child in my arms and I felt terrible. Her own mother wouldn't even take the time to sing her a lullaby…. Choking on my words due to the lump in my throat, I forced out, "Anytime. I'll sing to you whenever you want, alright Ko?"

She nodded again and I was surprised that she seemed so unfazed by what she had just said. She had practically admitted that her mother doesn't love her, yet she was smiling at me and thanking me for singing to her like no one else ever had or would. Suddenly unable to stand being in my room with the feelings of isolation and sorrow attacking me, I asked Seiko, "Hey, you wanna go out with me? I need some groceries and would love to have a helper."

Excited by my offer and forgetting her previous sadness like only an eight year old could, Seiko jumped up and nodded vigorously, all too happy to help with a task as foolish and boring as grocery shopping. Feeling a pang of guilt and sympathy, I smiled and stood up, letting her grab my hand and yank me hurriedly from my room.

The next three hours were spent shopping for food and chasing Seiko through the grocery store riding on a shopping cart. I'd never realized it, but it's really hard shopping with an eight year old. They want _everything._ Finally done with the hazardous and troublesome task, I dropped off all the food and told Seiko I'd walk her home.

Leaving the house again, I watched as she ran happily, kicking up dead leaves and chasing birds. She seemed so happy despite the events from earlier today. And I know I'm terrible for this, but I felt slightly jealous. I wanted that. I wanted to be able to forget feeling pain, to forget everything that made me cry or harmed me. But I couldn't, and she could, and that in itself hurt more than I ever thought it would.

The sound of rusted, creaking metal and a familiar laugh pulled me from my thoughts. I'd been so absorbed with them that I hadn't realized Seiko and I were passing the park. Seiko was actually the cause of the creaking, which was coming from the old swing she was playing on. I sighed and smiled a tiny bit, laughing as she tried to get herself to go really high but only got the swing to move in a spasmodic twist of metal and child.

Walking up and preparing to grab the swing, I asked, "You want help?"

Turning to face me and kicking out, she yelled obstinately, "No! I can do it myself!"

I held up my hands in surrender, backing away from the whirlwind of brown hair and legs spinning rapidly towards me. Rolling my eyes at her childishness, I walked over to a bench and sat down, wincing at the feel of the cool cement through my jeans. I closed my eyes and inhaled deep, preparing to relax when I got an idea. Opening my eyes again and quickly hopping up, I called out to Seiko, "C'mon we need to go! I wanna show you something."

I could tell that she wanted to protest at first, but she hopped off the swing and trotted over to me, reminding me of a puppy. Grabbing her hand, I led her down a few streets, finally coming to a small business district. Obviously puzzled, Seiko looked up at me. I simply pointed to the building in front of us.

It was a small building painted in warm colors. Sprinkles of pastel color were splotched here and there on the façade and a neon sign shaped like an ice cream cone read 'Sprinkles' and glowed pink and blue in the early twilight. Seiko was really excited, jumping up and down and asking, "Do I get ice cream?"

I nodded and followed her as she rushed into the store. I fought with memories as Seiko and I ordered. _Come on Lett, pick. It's not that hard sweetheart. Can't decide? Get both!_ I shook my head, telling my mind to shut up. It was then that I realized the old woman taking our order had asked me what I wanted. "O-oh uh….I'll have a scoop of French vanilla and chocolate."

She smiled and nodded, chuckling as she got me my ice cream. As I paid, I was taken aback when the old lady asked, "Have I met you before?"

"U-um no. I've never seen you before in my life."

She frowned. "Oh, that's a shame. I could have sworn you were a young girl I used to know. She and her mother always used to come here….. I wonder what happened to them? Nothing bad, I hope."

My mouth was suddenly dry. "Yeah. That would be a shame."

The old lady agreed and handed me my change with a smile. I took it robotically and then walked Seiko the rest of the way home. She was busy with the troublesome task of eating melting ice cream and trying to keep it from falling off the cone, so our walk was extremely quiet. I honestly didn't mind. It was only once she'd finished her ice cream and I had to talk to her that I missed the silence.

After what felt like an eternity, we'd reached her house and Seiko turned to hug me, whispering in my ear, "Thanks for everything, Lett. And I'm sorry….I didn't mean to be weak. I really tried to stay at home this time. Honest."

I wrapped my arms around her. "Don't apologize. You weren't being weak. You're the strongest person I know. Besides, everyone needs to be weak sometimes."

She pulled back and looked me straight in the eye. "I'm not strong. But you are. You're the toughest person alive." I shook my head, about to say something, when she continued. "You know, when I grow up, I wanna be just like you."

My eyes widened and Seiko smiled. I opened my mouth, then closed it, then opened it again, still unable to work my vocal chords correctly. "That's really sweet of you to say, but I promise you that growing up to be yourself will get you farther than growing up to be like me will ever get you."

"Nope. You're amazing. I wish I was you. You're pretty and smart and tough and good at everything. And you're not weak because you're the strongest person I know."

Before I could say anything, the front door was thrown open and Seiko was grabbed roughly by the arm as a woman's harsh voice hissed, "Inside, _now."_

Reaching towards Seiko's scared form; I yanked my arm back as the door slammed with a final _bang_. Sitting stiffly for a moment, I finally forced myself up and began the long and lonely walk home. Quietly humming the song I'd sung earlier and laughing bitterly as the strongest person Seiko knew cried, I couldn't help but think of how she had mentioned wanting to grow up to be just like me, and hating how she couldn't have been more wrong.

**Ok so if anyone is wondering what Lett sings it's called Asleep. It was originally done by The Smiths, but the version I listened to while writing was the one done by Emily Browning. Both versions are good. **

**Now that that's out of the way, what'd you think? Was this ok? I'm not really thrilled with the way it came out but I'll survive -_- Anyway, before I say goodnight and goodbye, I want to say congrats to my little sis for placing second in her show choir competition and to my friends Lacey and Caity for placing first! I love all of you guys and you did great today! Till next time ^^**

**-Scarlett **


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi again! God it's been forever since I last updated….. I'm super sorry. My life's been way too crazy recently and I've been depressed as per usual. Please don't hate me for taking this long. Anyway, here's chapter 8! Enjoy ^-^**

I lazily hummed the song playing on my iPod as I trudged to school. My terrible mood from the long and crappy weekend hung around me like a black cloud and I was still really depressed after my talk with Seiko yesterday. How could she look up to me so much? Why did she look up to me so much? I certainly didn't know. Shaking my head, I yanked my backpack higher on my shoulders and slouched through the school gates.

Walking across the empty campus, I pulled my headphones from my ears and let them hang haphazardly around my neck so that Bright wouldn't be an ass and confiscate them. I stalked through the halls silently and when I reached my first period, I checked the clock before entering. Ten minutes late. I smirked a little. Bright was going to be royally pissed.

Quickly trading the smirk on my lips for a more stoic expression, I pushed the door open just as Bright was mid-lecture about some boring war. His hand was about an inch from writing something on the board but he had apparently decided that it was more important for him to glare at me than to actually finish writing. Walking toward my seat, I heard Bright say, "And just what do you think you're doing, Mr. Citali?"

I turned to face him with my eyebrow quirked, slightly amused by his startled expression as he took in my bruises and now healing split lip. "Going to my seat. Why, did it look like I was going to do something else?" I could hear the irritation and sarcasm dripping from my voice and was completely unsurprised when Bright recovered from his surprise and slammed his marker down in anger.

"I am tired of your sass! Detention! I will see you at lunch Mr. Citali! "

I looked directly into his eyes, seeing that he was actually fed up. So was I. Sighing, I just said, "You and I both know that you don't want that any more than I do. Would you seriously like to spend your lunch babysitting me? Because I guarantee you that giving me detention is more of a punishment for yourself than for me."

Seeing his flustered expression and knowing that I was right, I just gave Bright a small and triumphant smile. Still flustered he pointed angrily to my desk and hissed, "Seat, now! And don't you dare interrupt my class again!" The smile stuck to my lips as I thought of how I wouldn't have detention at lunch.

Walking to my seat as Bright resumed his boring lesson, I could feel the curious eyes of my classmates as they examined what I knew were the bright bruises still covering me. Though I was wearing a black hoodie and jeans so as not to show the cuts and bruises covering my arms, I knew that they were all looking at the purple and blue bruises scattered on my face along with the few cuts and my bloody, cracked lips. Quite honestly, I had expected nothing less. Hell, when I had seen my reflection I had been grotesquely fascinated, too.

Sitting and tuning out Bright as per usual, I heard the frantic whispers of the class as rumors about my last "fight" spread like wildfire. _Of course_, I thought bitterly. _Of course they have to assume they know me_. Feeling disgusted with the people around me as well as with myself, I turned to moodily look out the window, dreaming of being anywhere but there. As I was drifting into a state of wakeful sleep and thinking of excuses to tell my friends to explain my face, I heard a familiar voice from beside me hiss, "Hey Lettie, what'd you do to your face?"

Focusing and turning to face the irritant known as Nick, I sighed and said point blank, "My father beat the living shit out of me."

Nick looked shocked for a brief moment but then burst out laughing. "Good one! I almost believed you for a second there! What really happened? I heard you fought some huge dude for harassing you."

I couldn't help the slight pang I felt when he laughed. Pain knotted my stomach as I fought to keep my facial expression carefully blank. Of course he wouldn't believe me. Why would he? Everyone thought I was tough, a fighter. No one could beat me. Especially not my own father…right? And of course he believed all of the rumors. That's all anybody at this school knew about me; nothing but the false lies and accusations that they themselves created for me. Even at school I wasn't my own person; my father took my identity at home and the people surrounding me created one at school. Suddenly becoming irritated and having no one other than Nick to take it out on, I spat, "Yeah it's absolutely fucking hilarious. And what happened to you hating me, hmm? If I recall correctly you called me an ass and said my friends deserve better than me. So please, explain to me why _you_ of all people should give a damn about what happens to me?"

Nick looked taken aback and pretty surprised, though he looked a little apologetic, too. "I was just mad. I didn't mean to offend you or anything. I'm sorry. And I'm your friend. I have every right to give a damn about you. So what happened? Did you get your ass kicked, Lettie?"

Now it was my turn to be surprised. What the hell? Since when was he my friend? I couldn't stand this boy. And from what I could tell he wasn't exactly my biggest fan either….. And why did he look so sincere? So apologetic? I almost wanted to believe him…..almost. Instead, I let my anger and pain speak for me as I hissed back, "Yeah, well you're not my friend so stop trying to figure out what happened to me. It doesn't matter anyway. I got in a fight and I got beat up and that's all that should matter to you. Now leave me alone."

Now anger flashed in Nick's eyes. "What the hell is your problem? I'm being nice and apologized for Friday and you're being a jerk again! I gave you a second chance because from what I've heard from your friends you're a really cool guy and they all love you! So why can't you give me a chance?"

By this point, everyone in the class was aware of our argument due to the fact that dumbass extraordinaire was yelling at me. The whole class was staring in absolute surprise and fascination as Nick yelled at me and I stood up, screaming back, "What part of leave me alone don't you understand!? God you really must be an idiot! And I never asked for a second chance! Hell, I didn't want a first one! I was perfectly happy before you came and started messing with my life!"

Now Nick stood up, leaning on his desk as he yelled, "Oh my God do you even _hear_ yourself? What is wrong with you!? I'm just trying to be your friend! And you're not exactly making it easy!"

I snorted. "_I'm_ not making it easy to be nice? Have you even met yourself? You're not exactly a piece of cake! And I never asked for you to be my friend! Stop trying!"

"Fine then! I give up! You can be an asshole and end up on your own! See if I care!"

I gave a laugh of what the class took to be happiness, though I knew it was one of agony. "Finally! It took you long enough to get the message you stupid jackass! Now will you finally leave me alone?"

"You couldn't even-," Nick was cut off by Bright grabbing his arm harshly.

At this point, Nick and I were extremely loud and Bright was extremely mad. Apparently he had been yelling at me and Nick since our little argument had started, but we had been so focused on each other that we hadn't heard him. Now he had my arm and Nick's arm in a tight grasp, yanking us harshly to the door of his class. Throwing us out, he yelled, "I am fed up! Both of you, principal's office, now! And I will see you in after school detention so you two can spend quality time together cleaning my class!" Then the door was slammed in our faces.

Turning to face Nick, whose face was red from yelling, I gave a groan of aggravation and stormed away, stalking to the roof as he cussed and stalked towards the principal's office.

Reaching the roof, I let out a scream of pure frustration, falling to my knees and feeling my arms shake. Emotions flooded my body and I hung my head as the first tears began to fall. Breathing hard, I fought the feelings forcing themselves into my chest. For some reason, it hurt to breathe. Maybe because there was a huge hole where my heart was supposed to be? Whatever the reason, I curled up on the cold cement and sobbed. Pitiful, bitter tears streamed from my cheeks relentlessly as I longed for some way, _any_ way, to relieve the pain.

I hadn't meant to be so harsh with Nick….. I wasn't even mad at him, really. Sure, he had irritated me, but I was more irritated with myself than with him. He had just picked a fight…. God, I feel horrible. Why do I have to push everyone away? Why was I so mean? Maybe Nick is right. Maybe there is something wrong with me.

Sobs racked my small form as my body ached from my many injuries. Why did I hurt so much? And why the hell had I cried so much? I _hate_ crying. It's just…wrong. Biting my lip, I forced my breathing to calm, the tears eventually subsiding. Sitting up and letting the cool breeze freeze the tracks the tears had traced on my cheeks, I started to lock the pain up, saving it for later when I could fully analyze why I hurt so much. Waiting until I heard the bell ring to return to the halls, I eventually climbed down the stairs and avoided people as much as I could.

Thoughts of Nick swarmed my mind. Tried to be my friend… Cared about me….. Shaking my head to dislodge the unwanted thoughts, I slumped moodily into my seat second period. By this point the rumors of not only my bruises but also of my fight with Nick had reached just about every person in the school. Great…

The rest of my classes were spent carefully avoiding conversation with anyone, and if Nick was there I avoided him at all costs. Lunch eventually rolled around and when I reached my normal spot, I found Nick laughing with my friends. And there were feelings of both anger and jealousy. Stalking to sit next to Naoki, I felt the group go silent as I sat down.

Expressions of various kinds hung on my friends' faces. Nick looked cold and furious to even be breathing the same air as me. Nyx and Nori seemed calculating and slightly worried. Audrey looked absolutely horrified and Adrian looked pretty shocked. Naoki looked…indescribable. There was a sense of worry but also a large amount of anger, though what had pissed him off was completely unknown to me.

Looking up through my bangs awkwardly, I said quietly, "Hey guys….."

Audrey was the first to speak up. "Are you kidding me, Lett? You weren't here Friday and you show up to school looking like you were beaten half to death, and all you have to say is 'hey guys!?'"

I flinched at her tone. "I don't look that bad," I muttered.

Looking like a fish out of water as she opened and closed her mouth due to lack of having something to say, Audrey turned to the rest of the group to talk for her.

"Lett, that's bullshit! Have you even seen your face!? I mean Jesus! I haven't seen it this bad since you took on that huge druggie that was hitting on Audrey! What the hell happened," Adrian asked for his sister, sounding equally mad.

I sighed, looking up fully and meeting Adrian's gaze. "Guys I'm fine. I just picked a fight with someone a little bigger than I thought, is all….. I didn't consider the situation carefully enough. It won't happen again." My voice sounded hollow in my ears as the lies floated through my head to form a decent escape from the horrible truths of my life. Glancing briefly at Nick, I found him wearing a clod mask, his thoughts on what I was saying unreadable.

"Lett, you can't keep fighting huge guys," Nori said calmly. "I know you're an amazing fighter, I do. But there are people out there who are better than you….and I'm afraid that one day you're gonna pick a fight you can't win."

I nodded solemnly. "I know Nori. I'll be more careful next time."

Suddenly Naoki grabbed my arm, pulling me to my feet and calling over his shoulder, "Be right back. I need to talk to Lett privately for a moment." My friends gave him careful looks and Nick looked…..off, but before I could ask Naoki had my arm in his tight grip and yanked me to my feet. Then he towed me behind him, confused and curious, to the far side of the roof where our other friends couldn't hear us.

"Naoki what-,"

"Lett, what the hell did you get yourself into? Do you have any idea how bad your face looks right now!?"

I looked at him, slightly surprised by his tone. "Naoki, it's not that bad. And I didn't get myself into anything. Will you please calm down?"

"Calm down!? How do you expect me to be calm!? You have bruises and cuts and a split lip and you weren't here Friday! Do you have any idea how worried everyone was? How worried I was," Naoki yelled.

I flinched. "God Naoki, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you worry but believe it or not I know what I'm doing! I can fend for myself and I know how to fight-,"

"No, Lett, you don't know what you're doing! You have no idea! You don't seem to understand that you're a girl and that you aren't invincible! You take on guys that are five times your size and act as though it's nothing! You are a good fighter, you're amazing! But Jesus Lett! One of these days you're gonna pick too big of a fight and you're gonna get seriously hurt! You can't always win, doll," he said, ending his sentence in a more sober voice as he called me by the affectionate nickname.

"Naoki, I am a girl. I understand that perfectly fine. But I can fight! I have never once taken things too far! I'm strong and-,"

"I know you're strong, Lett! I'm not questioning your strength! But I'm not letting you fight anymore! You're done. I'm not watching you hurt yourself to prove that you can be a guy when _you aren't one," _Naoki said, yelling again.

I grimaced as Naoki shouted at me, flinching from his words. "I know I'm a fucking girl, Naoki! You don't have to remind me! My father does it every day for you! But you are _not _stopping me from fighting! If I want to fight I will," I shouted back at him.

"Goddammit! Why are you so stubborn!? Lett, you're hurting us! Don't you see that? You kill every single one of us when you fight! We can't stand to see you hurt! I thought Audrey was gonna freak out Friday! She thought you might have taken a fight too far! She was _crying,_ Lett. Do you have any idea how tiring it is to have to wonder if your best friend has gotten herself beaten to a bloody pulp because she hasn't shown up at school and won't pick up her phone? We love you, doll. And there is no way I'm letting you fight….." Naoki trailed off quietly, looking down so his bangs covered his face. When he looked up his expression was pained.

I stared at Naoki, noticing for the first time that his anger had subsided and his large midnight eyes were full of worry. And I felt horrible. I can't believe I had been hurting my friends for so long….. I can't believe they hadn't ever told me what I was doing to them. Guilt knotted my stomach and I swallowed tears as I looked at my best friend. Suddenly, our argument felt petty and all I wanted was for him to be reassured that I was okay. I walked forward, wrapping my arms around the beautiful boy in front of me.

"I'm sorry Nao….," I choked out, burying my face in his chest as he held me tight. "I never meant to scare you guys….. But please don't make me stop fighting…. I need it." I trailed off and looked up into his dark eyes. Today they weren't brooding like normal, but soft and open, emotions flooding through his blue orbs.

He sighed, gently tracing a bruise on my cheek with his finger. A rueful smile tugged at his lips, but something in his eyes seemed immeasurably sad. "Lett, you and I both know that it won't make a difference if I say yes or no. You'll do what you want. You always have."

A small smile tugged at my lips as I laughed a little. "You know me well."

He smiled despite himself and chuckled, tightening his grip on me and dropping a quick kiss on the top of my head. "Yeah, I know you pretty well. Just be careful, alright doll? I can't bear to see you hurt."

I smiled wider and nodded, blushing a little at the kiss on my head. When had he started doing that? He had started calling me doll a while back, and he'd always hugged me, but I don't recall him ever kissing my head. What was up with that? Shaking off the surprise and telling myself I was overthinking Naoki's harmless action, I let go of his waist and said, "Hey, can I go calm down the rest of the psychopaths now? I need to apologize and make sure they're okay…"

Naoki laughed and let me go, nodding his head, but before I could get too far, he grabbed my hand and said, "Hey Lett, you know that I'll do anything for you, right?"

Curious, I paused and said, "Yeah, of course. Why?"

Naoki looked away from me. "Well…..I heard that you and Nick fought, and I just wanted you to know that I'll kick his ass for you anytime, alright doll? You don't have to be the only strong one."

I burst out laughing at Naoki's offer, giving him another hug before letting go. "Of course! I want to watch though." With that, I gave him a brief smile and then started walking back to my friends.

When me and Naoki reached the group, I immediately walked over to the more then slightly pissed Audrey and wrapped my arms around her. She didn't hug me back, which meant I was in super deep shit. "I'm sorry, Audrey. I didn't mean to make you worry. You know how I am…," I trailed off as she wrapped her arms tightly around my waist, smashing me against her in a bone crushing hug.

"I know. You're just an idiot," she whispered into my hair. "But God you scared me shitless!"

I smiled and pulled back, knowing the worst was over. "I know. And I feel horrible. Am I forgiven?"

She laughed breathlessly before smirking wickedly. "Forgiven? Of course. You know I can't stay mad at you! But you soooo owe me. I say we get to go shopping and get you a wonderful makeover."

Groaning at the fact that I would have to go shopping and get a makeover (gross) but smiling at the fact that I was forgiven, I nodded. "I guess I kinda asked for that one."

"Oh you so did. Just be happy I'm letting you off with something as easy as shopping! I could make you go to the Winter Formal."

My face paled and I shuddered. I hate dances with a passion. "Have I mentioned how much I love you and just how truly, _truly _sorry I am? Because I really do love you and I'm _really_ sorry."

Audrey and the rest of the group laughed as they watched me try to worm and beg my way out of the possibility of going to a dance. Glaring and pouting as they laughed, I noticed from the corner of my eye that Nick was smiling slightly as he watched our little bantering. Does that mean he doesn't hate me? I was snapped out of my thoughts as Audrey said in a teasing manner, "Don't worry Lett, I'm not feeling _that_ evil today, but I never get tired of hearing you say you're sorry. And how much do you love me again?"

Trying to keep a serious face from her teasing, I said, "I'm very sorry and I love you _thiiisss_ much." I stretched out the word this and held my arms wide as my friends continued to laugh.

"That's what I thought. Now go apologize to everyone else, idiot."

I gave Audrey another hug before turning to everyone else. "I'm sorry guys. I didn't mean to make you guys worry. Promise. Can you guys manage to forgive me?"

"I dunno, Lett. We were pretty worried….," Adrian said in a teasing tone, letting me know that I was forgiven. Smiling and offering him a hug, he came and wrapped his arms around me, letting everyone else glomp me at the same time. I laughed as I fell to the ground with everyone on top of me except for Adrian, who was lucky enough to have my fat ass in his lap. Whoops.

"I love you guys," I mumbled happily, smiling with them as we all climbed off of Adrian. The rest of lunch was spent with us happily teasing each other and talking, and even though Nick was there and we were still tense from our fight, I was the happiest I had been in days. I had my friends next to me and I was forgiven and I knew they loved me, and for now, that was enough.

**Wow kinda a long and boring filler chapter. Definitely not proud of myself for this one. I'm so sorry. I didn't want to just skip Lett's friends' reactions to her bruises so I kinda showed them here….. Again, I'm super sorry. Next chapter will be more interesting! Until then, don't forget to favorite, follow, and review! Love you guys~**

**-Scarlett**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sup guys. So life remains crazy but I finally got time to update! Here's chapter nine! Enjoy ^-^**

After lunch and the gushy makeup session I had with my beloved and idiotic friends, I spent the rest of the day dreading detention with Nick. What was he going to do? Was he gonna yell at me more? Ignore me? Call me more horrible, self-esteem killing names? I honestly couldn't care less if he hated me (he wouldn't be the first person to do it so I'd survive) but I couldn't take anymore shit from him today.

Sighing and fisting my hand in my sloppy bangs, I leaned on my desk sixth period, torturing myself with thoughts of all the possible scenarios of what could happen in detention. When the bell finally rang, I groaned and irritably stood up. Halfheartedly grabbing my backpack and slinging it lazily and dejectedly over my shoulder, I exited the room and headed towards Bright's room, also known as my personal hell for the next hour and a half.

When I reached Bright's door I threw one last longing look towards the bright, welcoming sunshine of outside before forcing myself through the door and into the evil room I had spent far too much time in over the course of the year. Grumpily stumbling into the room, I glanced around and noticed that no one other than Nick and Bright were there. _Of course_, I thought snidely. _The one day I get detention and actually __**need **__someone else to be here with me, all of the other delinquent children decide to be good and not get in trouble. Perfect. _

Not thrilled with the newfound knowledge that there wouldn't be anyone to save me from Nick and Bright and that I was going to be stuck with both of the infuriating people all alone, I stalked to a seat in the farthest, darkest corner of the room and plopped down in it, sighing and leaning back in the chair. Resting my head against the wall and closing my eyes in the hopes of sleeping, I became aware of Bright's all too happy voice pulling me from my peaceful darkness.

"Lett, where do you think you're going? Front. Now."

I groaned and slammed my head on my desk, emitting a hollow _thunk_ and a grimace from me. I forgot how much desks hurt. Glancing up from the corner of my eye to see Bright pointing to a seat one over from Nick, I groaned again. Y_ou've got to be kidding me!_

While I was in the middle of my internal dilemma of whether I should just ignore him or actually move to the front like a good student (ew gross), Bright called out, "If you don't do it I'll give you another week of detention."

My head quickly shot up as I stared at him incredulously. "What do you mean another week of detention!? I thought I only had to go for today!"

Bright just rolled his eyes in an arrogant way that gave the impression of him being better than me. "If you went to the principal's office like you were told you would have had only today. However, you didn't go to the principal's office so you got a week. And I am seriously considering giving you another one, Mr. Citali. Care to push your luck?"

I stood up, glaring at the evil man as he smirked triumphantly, and slunk to my new seat in the front of the room. Nick was diligently ignoring me and didn't seem thrilled that I was in the same room as him. Good riddance. Slamming into the seat and shooting a venomous and sarcastic smile in Bright's direction, I put my head on my desk again, closing my eyes and praying for peace.

Now that I was sitting, the fatigue that had been sitting at the back of my consciousness all day attacked and I was aware of just how truly worn out I was. I had been under enough stress in the last six days to last me a month, and after fighting for so long, my body was physically unable to function. My eyes began to droop and I was in desperate need of a nap. I decided to let myself doze off.

I continued to sit and doze in and out of a hazy and comfortable drowsiness. The classroom was remarkably warm and the silence was welcoming and fragile. The sun from the window created a pale canvas on my desk and the warmth spread and blossomed across my back, making me feel relaxed and even more tired. I could feel my breathing slowing and was vaguely aware of the things around me fading into a gray and uncertain blur as sleep tugged at my mind and body.

Nightmares have always plagued my sleep, but since everything had happened with Nick they had gotten worse. From about the age of nine and up, I couldn't recall a night where I hadn't woken up at least once, whether it be from a nightmare or the fact that I just didn't feel safe in my own home. Either way, the images had become horrible. I saw myself and the people I love dying, my friends and Sue leaving me, my mother crying for help as my father beat her, Seiko being beaten by her parents as my father beats me, and Nick and the people I love taunting me with all of the horrible names I had ever been called or had called myself. Hell, there were some nights my own memories were played to me like some sick cinema in my sleep. And I almost always woke up shaking and short of breath as terror gripped me, or some nights I just woke up crying. The nightmares killed me. I was becoming terrified to sleep, paranoid of what grotesque torture my mind would play for me if I did.

But in the warmth of the classroom with the dull and monotonous tick of the clock, the quietly echoing halls, and the sound of Bright's pencil moving fluidly across paper creating a soothing symphony of familiarity, I was finding it hard to keep my eyes open for the first time in about a month.

After what seemed like mere minutes, I became foggily aware of the seat next to me being occupied by a loud _plunk_ as someone plopped down in it. Sighing and lifting my head to glance through the shield of my bangs and see Nick sitting there, I moaned and turned my head back into the comforting shadow of my arms, mumbling into the desk, "What do you want?"

"Did you enjoy your nap?"

I lifted my head, squinting in the bright light of the room as my tired and blurry eyes adjusted, and shot a snide look in said boy's direction. "Of course I did! Especially since a certain someone is bothering me and I haven't had the chance to!"

Nick cocked his head, clearly puzzled, but then realization dawned on his features and he seemed amused. "Lettie, you've been asleep for about half an hour."

"What? No I have n-," I trailed off my indignant rant as I caught sight of the clock and realized that he was actually right. I _had _been asleep. Feeling slightly embarrassed and looking away, I simply muttered, "Oh. I guess I didn't realize….."

Nick chuckled and said quietly, "That tired, huh?"

I just stared blankly at him, not willing to be forthcoming with the information that I was dead tired and never slept for more than a few hours a night. Why tell him? It wasn't like he could help and I didn't want any more teasing or questions. "Ugh, I can't believe I slept in front of _you_."

Nick hesitated a moment, clearly waiting for me to say more, but when I didn't, he just sighed and said, "I'm sorry."

Completely shocked and probably looking like a retarded fish, I said stupidly, "What?"

"I said I'm sorry. I shouldn't have blown up on you like that, I shouldn't have said the things I did , and I shouldn't have acted like I know you when I clearly don't. I'm sorry."

I was completely taken by surprise as I stared at the popular and cocky boy that had made it his job to torture me. When had this happened? He was acting nice and I felt bad for being such a jerk, and I kinda wanted to be his friend. It was almost too good to be true. However, then he continued talking and ruined the moment.

"I know you were acting like an ass, and you were a complete and total nightmare, but I guess I asked for it…."

At this point, I cut him off and with a small smirk, said sarcastically, "Is this your first apology? Cause so far it sucks."

He grinned, chuckling despite himself and mumbled, "Hey, I'm trying here! And come on Lett, you have to admit that you weren't being an angel. Actually, you were downright hellish."

I kept my face blank, blocking all emotion from it as I said pointblank, "That's as nice as I get. Sorry to disappoint."

He snorted and shook his head. "Bull. I saw you today with your friends. That's part of why I'm apologizing. I think we got off to a bad start. We're obviously very different people, and we started fighting really fast. I'll admit that you get under my skin better than anyone….,"

"Yeah well you annoy the hell outta me, too," I shot back, refusing to let him do all the talking, especially if he was going to throw in masked insults.

"Oh my God that's not the point! Now will you kindly _shut up_ and let me finish? Look, I walked into your life acting like I had known you forever and I belonged there, and it's clear that maybe I don't. But I really don't hate you. I know I've been an ass, and I've apologized for it. That's all I can do. But I don't want to keep fighting with you. I wanna try and make you not hate me. I think you're a really cool person, and since the first day I saw you I became determined to get to know you. I would really like to be your friend. Do you think we can try to make that work?" Nick finished looking like he was worn out and confused, and I'll admit that I was, too.

I stared at him as I tried to take everything in. My head was jumbled and confused, emotions running through me in a blur of destructive intent, making my heart find it hard to hate the boy in front of me. I needed to hate him. I couldn't let him get close to me.

For those of you out there that haven't caught on yet, I'm not a very trusting person, and Nick hadn't exactly given me any reason to trust him. I had been hurt by him before, and I honestly couldn't afford to have my trust destroyed by another person. I couldn't let him in. So instead of accepting his apology, I suspiciously said, "Why should I believe you? You treated me like shit earlier, have been nothing but an ass to me, and said you hated me. And now that you're all nice you expect me to just say okay let's be best friends? You're either bipolar, stupid, or you want something. Which is it?"

Nick seemed taken aback for a brief moment, and some wretched part of me hoped his temper would flare, making him change his mind before I did something stupid like forgive him. Instead, he recovered quickly and calmly replied, "I don't want anything Lett. I just want to be your friend."

"Okay, then why? What made you change your mind about me when you were so obviously done earlier?"

I watched as Nick paused, clearly thinking of what to say. In that brief period, I wondered if he even knew why he wanted to be my "friend" so badly, or if he was panicking for being called out on a lie. However, when he responded I was blown away.

"I can't really say what drew me to you, or why I'm so fascinated with the person you are. Maybe it was when I saw you alone in the back of the room and how everyone in the class seemed to be in a whole other universe. Maybe it was your longing stare at the sky, and the way you looked like if you could fly, you would be gone in a heartbeat. Maybe it was all of the horrible rumors I'd heard about you being the "delinquent" and "badass" of the school. Or maybe after I talked to you and I began to love teasing you. I honestly can't say.

But today at lunch, when I saw you with your friends, and every single one of them was crowding around you and concerned, something in me clicked. They love you a lot, hell, they _adore_ you. Their eyes light up when they see you, and it's so obvious that you mean the world to each and every one of them. And that says something. If all of those people think you're amazing and love you that much, there has to be something I'm not seeing, some part of you I missed. And then I knew I had missed something when I saw how worried you were about them being mad at you, how you were so sorry that you had caused them any grief. When you were forgiven and you were hugging and laughing and smiling, there was such a genuine happiness there that it was almost tangible. It made me smile. I realized then that you were worth fighting for, even though it's been a hell of a fight."

I sat in wide eyed wonder, staring in absolute shock at the strange boy in front of me. He had caused me so much grief and haunted me with his words, making him easy to hate since the first day I met him. Now here he was, telling me things that were far too nice to come from somebody who didn't know me at all, and it was becoming really hard to hate him. I swallowed hard, fighting the lump in my throat and trying my hardest to keep the rising panic down.

I was afraid of this boy. He was being nice, and he was telling me things that made me feel….I don't know, wanted? He was nicer to me than anyone had been in a long time, and he was willing to fight for me. No one had ever fought for me, and God I desperately _wanted _someone who would, but I was terrified of it being this boy. I didn't want to be hurt, and I knew that if I let him in and he walked away, I would take the fall, not him. I liked hating him. I liked when he made it easy for me to shut him out like I shut out everyone else, never worrying about the possibility of them getting close to me and hurting me.

Now Nick had gone and shot that to hell. And it was freaking me out. My heart was racing in two conflicting directions and I didn't know which way to go. Part of it was saying give him a chance, he's worth the risk, while the other was screaming run idiot you've been hurt too many times. Images of Pierce and the last conversation I'd had with him surged in my mind, and I felt the paranoia of his betrayal blurring into this reality and tainting my judgment; making me afraid. Of course, I didn't show it in the least; I was still perfectly cool and collected on the outside, and all of my frantic struggles had taken nothing more than a second.

Hesitantly meeting Nick's gaze, I searched for a reason to deny him. I didn't find anything. He looked earnest and slightly hopeful, and I would admit that the small, girlish part of me found him slightly cute in that moment. So, despite my frantic internal mess, I allowed a small and rare almost-smile to steal onto my features as I said, "That has got to be some of the most stupid shit I have ever heard. However, I'm willing to look past your crappy apology and girly logic and I'll give this friendship thing a try. Deal?"

Nick smiled, his perfect white teeth all on display. Sighing in what appeared to be relief, he said, "God you're a pain in the ass! I thought you were gonna say no! And then I would seriously have to kill you."

I snorted. "Pssh. You couldn't kill me if you tried!"

"Could to! And where the hell is my apology? You haven't been nice to me either," Nick said, trying (and failing) to do the puppy dog eyes.

I looked at him and quirked my eyebrow. "I don't apologize to people, Fang. I think you should know that by now."

I watched as his smile grew even wider. "So you've finally decided to call me Fang, huh? I guess that's a better apology than sorry anyway."

I chuckled. "That's good cause you're not getting anything else. Now that that's settled, where the _hell_ is Bright?"

"He went to do some paperwork in the office about three minutes after you passed out."

I cocked my head. "He's not afraid we'll kill each other while he's gone?"

Fang laughed. "Guess not. Oh and by the way, did you know that you drool when you sleep?"

I growled irritably and spat, "I do not!"

"Oh really? Then what's that right….there," he called, leaning in and quickly flicking the corner of my mouth.

"You're gonna pay for that," I hissed, standing up and groaning as he moved to the other side of one of the desks.

"Oh, really? Whatcha gonna do, shorty? Kick my shins?"

I moaned in aggravation as I realized he was a full nine inches taller than me. "Shut up! It's not my fault you're freakishly tall! And at least I'm not gay!"

"What? Who the hell said I was gay?"

"Um, no one. But did you even _hear_ what you just said to me? It couldn't have been more fabulous if a freaking rainbow shitting unicorn said it!"

"I'm not gay! I'm straighter than the pole you dance on you little shit!"

The rest of detention was like that, Fang and I teasing each other and bickering back and forth. We had started a war to see which one of us could annoy the other more and it was kinda fun. I liked bugging him. Just then, the bell rang and I stretched, grabbing my backpack. As I exited Bright's room, I turned and called out, "Oh, Fang? One last thing. Are you _sure _you aren't gay?"

I watched as Fang growled and threw his backpack over his shoulder, lunging towards the door as I burst into laughter, sprinting down the hall towards the bright sunshine outside. Fang continued to chase me, yelling insults and profanities, and it was clear I had won our little war today.

As I ran outside and into the warm sunlight and the cool breeze, I couldn't fight the smile on my face. Because even though I was terrified of being hurt again, and I couldn't guarantee that Fang being my friend would work out, I could guarantee that it would be fun while it lasted. And that life is worth the risk. And in that moment, that was all I needed to know.

**Wow. Just…wow. I really hate this chapter. I can't believe I worked for like, two hours on this piece of shit. At least it's happier than most of my other chapters! I hope you guys don't mind the crappiness and will forgive me since Fang and Lettie are friends now and all the fun can begin. **

**I'll update when I can, but that probably won't be too soon cuz I've got to finish another fanfic and draw a bunch of crap for different people. Thanks for reading and I love you all for being patient with me and my story. Don't forget to favorite, follow, and review! Till next time!**

**-Scarlett**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey hey beloved readers~ **

**So life has been a major bitch and I felt like writing to take my mind off of things. I hope you enjoy and thanks for all the nice reviews I've been getting. You guys really brighten up my day 3**

I let out a hushed sigh, my head resting on my arms in the uncomfortable silence of sixth period study hall. Letting my tired blue eyes flit about the room, I caught sight of Fang looking my way and stuck my tongue out him, smiling slightly at the look on his face.

Today was Thursday, lazy and disappointing, not yet Friday but not quite as dull as the rest of the week. The students were worn out and ready for the weekend, but none of us had the energy to actually act excited about it today because it wasn't nearly close enough to Friday. Continuing my bored examination of the room, I let my gaze meander over to the clock, seeing that I had about three minutes left in class.

Feeling bored and knowing that three minutes would go by much faster with my iPod, I reached into my backpack and pulled out my beloved little gadget. Sighing in content as I pulled my headphones over my ears, I let my lips twitch into an almost smile as the loud silence of the classroom was cut off by the headphones covering my ears and the music playing softly through them. Resting my head back on my arms and closing my eyes, I began to think about idle things like what I'd thrown at Fang during lunch…

The bell interrupted my peacefully lazy thoughts and as I threw my stuff distractedly into my bag, Fang sauntered over to me and sat on the edge of my desk, pulling the headphones from my ears. "Sup, Lettie?"

I glared pointedly. "If you value having fingers I'd suggest you _not _touching my headphones. Now what do you want?"

Fang brushed off my threat with ease and made a mock hurt expression, holding a hand dramatically over his heart, saying, "What? I'm not allowed to just talk to my wonderful and amazing friend without wanting something from you? Ouch. You hurt me Lettie."

Scoffing and rolling my eyes at his childishness, I said, "Now you must _really _want something since you're complimenting me."

Fang smirked. "Okay so maybe I have a teeny tiny favor…."

"Whatever it is, no," I said, casually throwing my backpack over my shoulder and trying to put my headphones back on. However before I could reach them, Fang had both my headphones and iPod in his hand, backing away quickly as I lunged for the prized items. "Hey, give those back, asshole!"

"Lettie, hasn't anyone ever told you that it's impolite to have your headphones in while someone is talking to you? Now seriously, if you ever want to see these precious items again, listen up" he said as I chased him out of our classroom and started walking to meet my friends at the front of the school.

I shot him a cold stare. "Why should I? You took my headphones," I whined.

Fang chuckled and said, "God you're such a kid. But I'll make you a deal. You listen to what I have to say and you get your headphones back."

Grudgingly, I muttered, "Whatever. Deal."

"Alright so Audrey wanted me to ask you if you're free to hang out tonight. She says she wants to go out to like, dinner or something."

I raised an eyebrow, looking skeptically at Fang as we exited the school building into the warm-ish sun. "Why didn't she just ask me herself?"

Fang shrugged. "Dunno. But she wanted me to ask you."

Shaking my head as I saw my group of friends, I wandered over to them and laughed as Audrey tackled me with a hug. "Can you go? Can you? Fang, you asked him, right," Audrey said quickly, shooting an accusatory yet questioning look in what I assumed to be Fang's general direction.

"Yeah I told him. Jeez, why don't you just ask him yourself next time, Audrey? He'd take it better from you anyway."

Audrey unlatched herself from my side just long enough to make a face at Fang and mutter in a flustered manner, "I don't know! Because I didn't want to! Don't question my logic!"

Laughing at her tantrum and poking her side playfully, I asked, "What logic? We all know there's no room for logic in that pretty little head of yours!"

"Hey, I resent that! I'm actually really smart," she said with a pout. "At least smarter than you, anyway. Nori is like a God when it comes to smartness so there's no way I'm topping that."

Laughing harder, I dodged a jab in the ribs Audrey was sending my way. When she had given up on trying to poke me and grown tired of me and the rest of our friends' teasing, she huffed and said, "Whatever! You guys suck! So can you go, Lett? Pretty please?"

I looked at her large and pleading eyes, regretting the fact that I'd have to be telling her no. A sudden tightness gripped my chest, and I became aware that today I had to work at the diner. I hadn't been there since my fight with Sue due to the fact that she wouldn't let me in, always brushing me off and saying, "One of the interns can cover your shift." I hadn't had breakfast from her since our argument either, and I kinda had the impression that she might never forgive me. However, this morning I got a brief and to the point text saying that one of the interns couldn't make it and the diner was short-staffed, leaving me to do the job. I had felt a mixture of relief and nausea, but I immediately told Sue I'd be there. Now, I kinda wished that I could go out with my friends.

"I'm sorry but I can't. I've got to go to work at the diner and I can't ditch today. I haven't gone in all week," I said apologetically, resenting the fact that I had a conscience ever so slightly. I mean, seriously, anyone else in my position would be running off with their friends, but then there was me with this stupid, crappy sense of loyalty to someone who probably hated my guts by now.

Seeing disappointment dawn on Audrey's face, I walked forward and gave her a tight hug. "I'm so sorry. Hey, I still owe you that shopping spree slash makeover or whatever right? I told you I'd do it tomorrow, didn't I," I asked, instantly cursing that stupid conscience of mine again. It was seriously getting me into trouble today.

However, when a huge grin spread across her face and her eyes shone with a genuine happiness, I couldn't help but smile back and let a little spark of her happiness rub off on me. At least she was happy.

"Okay! We can go shopping, do your makeover, and then go see that new horror movie you wanted to see! Oooh, and after that we can have a sleepover at my house! You guys are all invited," she said excitedly, jumping up and down and giving a begging puppy a run for its money as she looked so innocent and cute and just plain happy. No one could tell her no, so they all just nodded in agreement, myself included.

"It's settled," she squealed. "I'll tell you the plans tomorrow at school. Everyone is at my house for the weekend. Oooh and Lett, can we come have dinner at the diner tonight? I haven't seen Sue in ages!"

I gulped, uneasily swallowing the nerves coming on. Should I tell her no? What if she asks why? I can't tell her about the fight. She'd freak and ask a lot of questions. Looking pleadingly towards Naoki for help, he seemed to get the frantic look in my eyes because he suddenly said, "Hey Drey, why don't we go to the diner tomorrow for dinner before the movie instead of tonight? Then Lett won't be working a shift and we can spend more time with him. Tonight we can try that new Mexican place I told you about. Lett doesn't really like Mexican food anyway…."

Audrey hesitated for a moment before smiling again. "Naoki, you are brilliant! I knew you were good for something," she teased.

Naoki pouted before pushing her lightly, causing her to stumble and fall on her ass. All of us laughed, and while she yelled profanities at Naoki, my phone buzzer went off. Which meant I had to go to work. _Shit_.

Sighing and running my fingers through my bangs, I mouthed a quick '_thank you' _to Naoki while everyone was busy teasing Audrey. He nodded and winked, causing me to stick my tongue out at him. Rolling my eyes, I said, "Alright, not to interrupt World War Three over here, but I gotta go to work, so I'll see you around crazies."

There was a chorus of indignant calls that I brushed off with laughter as I hopped down the steps of the school, jogging to the corner. Fang was yelling something about my headphones, and I remembered that he still had them, quickly running back to grab them as my friends laughed hysterically.

"Wow Let. You'll risk being late to work to save your headphones but not to spend a few more minutes with your friends? That really hurts," Fang said as I yanked the headphones and iPod from his grasp.

"Damn straight. I mean, I love you all dearly, but my music is my life. Now I seriously have to go," I called from over my shoulder as I ran to the corner again.

Continuing my walk to the diner, I could feel panic rising in me the closer I got. Finally, when I was only one block away, I began to really freak out. I loved Sue a lot, and she was pretty much the only person I had left besides my friends. The rest of the people I knew hated me, couldn't care less about my existence, or were like my father and beat the shit out of me. There was no one else. And I was becoming seriously scared that when I saw Sue today, she would be one of the people who couldn't care less anymore. It was seriously stressing me out.

When I finally saw the diner's storefront and smelt the usual smell of the flowers outside of the shop and the sweet pastries that Sue sold, I felt my stomach knot. Breathing in a shaky breath and walking to the door, I hung my head like a dog that had misbehaved and stepped into the diner.

Quickly hurrying across the room and behind the counter, I stepped into the back room and changed into my work clothes quickly. Stepping out and tying my apron loosely behind me, I saw that Sue was busy carrying out orders and was kindly refusing to look in my general direction. _Wonderful_, I thought dejectedly.

Deciding that it would be best to just do work where needed, I chose to man the cash register because it had been left unattended. Leaning lazily on the glass pastry container, I rested my head and my arms and examined all of the different customers, trying to figure out what they were like. Was the girl over there in the perfectly pleated plaid skirt and glasses smart? Did she have friends and a family, or was she as alone in the world as me? What about the boy with the brown hair and bloodshot eyes? What was he like? Was he as tired and stressed out as he looked? Was something horrible happening in his life? I continued to people watch like that for about twenty minutes before I got super bored. Checking the time, I figured it'd be another hour, hour and a half before I could go for 'lunch.'

Groaning, I grabbed a rag and wiped the counter near the register, hoping to feel productive in some way. I didn't. Looking around, I found a new hire named Samantha who had her hands full with dirty dishes. Feeling slightly relieved at the prospect of having something to do and not feeling like a waste of space getting paid, I walked over. "Here, let me take some of those," I said, putting on a small smile.

She looked relieved. "Oh my God thanks! It's swamped today!"

I laughed a little, taking some of the plates and dishes from her hands. "Yeah, but you'll get used to it. You're new, right?"

She looked at me, blushing a little. "That obvious, huh?"

I shook my head. "Eh, not really. But I've been working here long enough that I know every person here. I hadn't seen you around before so….," I trailed off a little uncomfortably, not sure what else to say.

"Oh, well I'm Samantha! But you can just call me Sam. Wait, are you Lett," she asked as we walked into the kitchen and dropped off our dishes. I paused, wiping my brow with the back of my hand before turning to face her. "The one and only," I said, leaning against the counter. "How'd you know?"

Sam blushed, looking away from me. "Oh, well I kinda go to the same high school as you….. And then when I applied for this job all my friends told me that a really hot guy from our school worked here. I didn't realize it was you until I interviewed with Sue. She had nothing but praise to say about you, and when I heard the name it kinda just clicked….."

By this point, I was uncomfortable and blushing like mad. "O-oh," I mumbled, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly.

Sam stared at me, still blushing, and said, "Well that was really awkward." I nodded mutely, still feeling embarrassed that she and her friends thought I was hot. If only they knew…. "Hey, this won't make it weird for you to work with me, right," she asked, moving so that she stood in front of me and could see my face.

"Oh, no of course not," I said quickly, looking up to see her expression. "Honestly, it doesn't bother me at all; I just don't know how to react when people compliment me or whatever…."

Sam laughed, and I realized that it was a very pretty laugh. Looking at her, I noticed that Sam herself was pretty. She had long auburn hair, pale, freckled skin, and large hazel eyes with flecks of green and gold. She wasn't very tall and had a petite build, and she seemed to smile all the time, showing off her flawless white teeth. She seemed like something out of a magazine, and standing next to her reminded me of seeing a deformed caterpillar near a beautiful butterfly. And for those of you out there that are stupid, yes, the deformed caterpillar is me. "Oh, well I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. You know, you're really different from what I thought you'd be," she said thoughtfully.

I cocked my head. "What'd you think I'd be? And how the hell did you know about me when I didn't even know you existed and we go to the same freaking school!?"

She laughed again (I really liked her laugh) and said, "Oh c'mon, Lett, _everyone_ knows who you are! You're the biggest fighter our school has ever seen _and _you're undefeated at that. You're notorious for being late, and half the girls in school would do anything to date you. I think people in the next county over have heard of you. And I guess you didn't know me because I'm a senior."

My eyes widened. "You're a senior?! I thought you were like a junior or something!"

She chuckled. "I always get that. You know, you're way nicer than everyone says."

I blushed again. "What does everyone say?"

"They say you're an asshole who cares about nobody but himself and that you have anger issues. You're supposedly antisocial and a dick to anyone that you don't like."

I looked away and mumbled, "Oh."

Sam smiled, hopping up on the counter next to me and swinging her legs. "Want me to let you in on a secret? I don't think that's true. I mean, I did before I met you, but now I think you're really cool. You're nice, and I think it's super cute how shy you are," she said, giggling when I blushed again.

"I'm not cute," I squeaked, wondering where the hell _that _comment had come from.

Sam smiled. "Lett, you are freaking adorable, and I say that in the most friendly and casual way possible. But it is so true."

"Goddammit will you quit complimenting me," I asked, seriously uncomfortable and not sure what to say.

The next few hours went like that, Sam and I hanging out and getting to know each other more. Turns out she wants to be a journalist when she's out of college, and she plans on majoring in journalism, minoring in photography. She lives with her mom and younger sister, but she plans on getting an apartment when she turns eighteen in three months. She's really popular around school, and she likes the same bands I do, which is awesome because apparently no one (besides my crazy friends) likes the music I like. Honestly, I really wished I would have met her sooner.

At 5:30, Sam told me that she was done working for the day and clocked out. "Hey Lett, isn't it time for your lunch break," she asked as she grabbed her things from the back of the diner.

I looked at the time. "Yeah, it is. I'm broke though so I'll probably just work through my lunch and eat like ramen or something when I get home."

"Clock out. I'll buy you dinner," she said casually, throwing her purse over her shoulder and looking at me expectantly.

My eyes widened and I frantically waved my arms around. "No no, it's fine! I just met you and I won't be able to pay you back and I don't want to waste your money on something stupid like feeding me!"

"Lett, get your butt out the door! You need to eat and it won't be a waste of my money. Besides, this can be like a celebration dinner. You said you like ramen, right?"

I stopped freaking out, cocking my head to the side in a confused manner. "Celebration dinner? What are you celebrating?"

"You being my friend, of course! I was seriously terrified when I came in to work today and I knew no one. You made my day like ten times better," she said with a wide smile.

I spazzed out again. I was her friend!? I thought she'd hate me like everyone else! I looked at her with wide eyes as I continued to squirm around in weird little wormy ways. "Wait, I'm your friend!? Seriously?"

Sam just laughed again. "Oh my God you are so freaking _cute_! Yes, I'm your friend Lett. It's really not surprising. I think you're my favorite person I've met all year."

I stared at her in shock, feeling a small but genuine smile creep onto my face. I had calmed down from freaking out, but was still all warm inside. I'd made a new friend! And it was just about then that I realized how uncharacteristic I was being. The whole school thought I was a tough, badass guy, and here I was being my normal, spazzy self in front of someone I just met. _Way to go idiot,_ I thought, clocking out and grabbing my jacket.

As Sam walked me around the corner to a little ramen shop she knew about, I took the time to apologize. "I'm super sorry about being a spaz. I'm just hyper today."

Sam smiled. "It's okay. I like you when you're like that. I've only ever seen you in school, but I like this version of you better. You seem happier."

I smiled. "Really? This is kinda what I'm like most of the time when I'm out of school."

"You should smile more. You look nice when you smile."

I blushed (apparently Sam was just good at doing that to me). "N-not really. I hate my smile."

"There you go being cute again! You know, you really are something else. One minute you can be all serious and scary and the next you can be like a fucking puppy! I don't get you," she said mater of factly.

"I am not cute goddammit!"

She laughed, and while we ate our ramen just talked aimlessly about nothing. I really liked Sam. She was easy to talk to and I knew we could get to be good friends, which was something completely rare for me.

After our meals, she walked me back to the diner and told me goodbye. I walked back into the diner and saw that it was about 6:00, so I had three more hours of work. Sighing and retying my apron, I dismally looked around the diner, realizing that I was in for a pretty boring night.

Going back to my original place behind the register, I heard the bell ring and looked up to see a tall boy with slightly long and jaggedly cut white hair enter the room. He was wearing a blue shirt and beige shorts, and even though it was the middle of November and it was kinda freezing outside, flipflops adorned his feet. He almost reminded me of someone you'd see at a beach. Looking around for a brief moment, he lazily strolled over to the counter where I was standing and appraised the menu. When he appeared to be done, I asked, "Can I take your order?"

Seeming surprised, he looked down at me with shocking, electric blue eyes. "Oh, sorry. I didn't realize you were there. Um, do you have any mango pudding," he asked, his tone happy and in an odd way, familiar.

I gave him a confused look. "Mango _what?_"

The boy sighed. "Mango pudding. No one seems to have it. Alright, I guess I'll order a burger, some fries, a turkey sandwich, a milk shake, and…one of those chocolate cakes," he said, casually pulling out a twenty.

I raised an eyebrow, skeptically looking at him and his lightly muscular yet thin build. "Um, are you sure? That's like, a lot of food."

The boy just laughed. "I take that as a challenge! Add a slice of pie."

I looked at him, still shocked, and nodded. He seemed strangely familiar the more I talked to him, but I shook it off and placed his order. "Alright then. I hope you enjoy your stomach ache," I said, throwing him a wicked and sarcastic smirk. He laughed again and went to find a seat, leaving me to be bored again.

I sat behind the counter doing nothing for about ten more minutes before I was completely done. Huffing in irritation, I walked over to Cook (his name was actually Michael but I'd been calling him Cook since I was like six so….) and asked him what tables I could cover and what their orders were.

He gave me about ten tables to deal with because the dinner rush had just started to come in. I walked around, wearing a fake grin and taking orders from both bitchy and nice people, and I was getting worn out. Walking back over to Cook, he gave me a huge tray of food and said, "Table ten."

Nodding, I walked over to table ten, only to find the boy from earlier.

"Oh, so I get to deal with the pissy waiter, huh," he said jokingly.

"Oh, but of course. I can't wait to see you try and eat all of this."

The boy just grinned. "When I win, I want mango pudding."

I raised an eyebrow. Cocky much? "Deal," I said. "I'll get you you're weird mango pudding if you win. But if I win, you owe me dessert." With that said, I walked away from the strange boy, continuing my shift.

By the end of my three hours when the diner had closed for the night, I had dealt with food being thrown at me by a little kid, an asshole guy who thought I was flirting with his girlfriend who looked like a fucking Barbie, and I owed that albino guy, I think he said his name was Tristan, mango pudding which he was coming to retrieve on Saturday. Feeling completely exhausted, I went and changed out of my work clothes, running a hand tiredly through my hair. As I was tying my shoes, Sue came in.

Feeling my heart beat a mile a minute, I whispered, "Hey Sue."

She looked at me for the briefest of moments before crushing me in a tight hug. Relief so sweet swarmed through me that tears threatened to leak from my eyes as I hugged her back. When she pulled away, she gave me the sternest look I had seen in weeks and said, "Scarlett Citali where do you think you have been? You scared me to death! I thought you had starved!"

My eyes widened and a small, surprised laugh escaped my lips. She didn't hate me! "I didn't come because I thought you were mad at me. You kept telling me not to come to work and I thought you were just done with me and all of the problems that come with me. I didn't mean to worry you. And I'm sorry about our fight."

Sue only shook her head. "You silly, stupid little girl. I would never in a million years leave you, baby. You're family. And we may not always agree, but you are not a problem, and I'm proud of you. Your mother would be proud of you, too."

I swallowed hard and smiled, hugging her again. "Thank you," I whispered into the fabric of her shirt. I had missed her. I had missed her so much.

We spent some time like that, sitting in the back room and just catching up with each other. She told me about her lonely week without me and I told her about my plans to have my friends at the diner tomorrow. She was excited to see Audrey and curious to meet Fang.

At about 10:30 I left the diner, throwing my bag over my shoulder and saying bye to Sue before trudging through the lively L.A. streets. Night life had come alive and the late night street walkers were coming out to play, turning the city into a whole new world filled with a completely different type of people. The laughter of young women and men filled the air, and the sound of drunken voices slurred through the nighttime soundtrack. Despite myself, my thoughts quickly jumped to my father and I vaguely wondered if he was one of those drunken, laughing voices. Shuddering at the thought, I shoved my hands in my pockets, ducking my head down and picking up the pace of my walking.

Shivering from the brisk wind whipping through my hair and biting my nose, I pulled my jacket tighter around me. Looking around the streets, I felt unsafe and unsure, knowing that I was not a part of the night crowd and that if they found me, I could be in some serious trouble, especially if my dad was prowling the streets.

Reaching the corner across from my apartment, a sudden and irrational fear of being outside lodged itself in my chest, and seeing no cars, I bolted across the street and pounded up the stairs, throwing my keys into the lock and flinging the door open, slamming it behind me and throwing the lock in place. Heaving a sigh, I leaned against the door and let my eyes slip closed. I noticed my mistake too late.

A thudding of footsteps pounded from the kitchen and I bolted my eyes open, seeing the inebriated figure of my father towering over me. "What the fuck do you think you're doing you little whore? What have I told you about being home late? I need my food!"

"It's in the fridge. All you need to do is microwave it. Or is that too challenging for you," I spat, regretting my defiance instantly.

A strong, hard backhand flew across my face and blood exploded in my mouth. I crumpled immediately, and when I opened my eyes, everything was a bright color of white. Leaning on the door, I looked up at the blurry figure of my father.

"You little piece of shit! Who do you think you are, talking to _me _like that? Don't you realize that I own you, you pathetic piece of trash?"

My vision finally focused and I caught sight of the vodka bottle in his hand, immediately realizing the trouble I could be in. I should not have picked this fight. Not when he was this drunk. Feeling the first tendrils of panic slipping into my stomach, I mumbled, "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-"

I was cut off by a sharp kick to the ribs. Gasping as all of the air rushed from my body, I fell forward onto my hands, retching as my lungs choked and constricted. "Don't you talk to me! You ungrateful little bitch! You have no right to talk to me! You're why I have nothing!"

Choking back tears as another flurry of kicks hit my stomach and ribs, I tried to stand up. I almost succeeded except for the fact that my father knocked my feet out from under me and forced my head into the wall with a sickening _thud._

Moaning in agony on the floor and gripping my head, I heard a flurry of insults from my father. "Whore! Bitch! Failure! Why were you born, you little piece of shit? You killed your brother! He was supposed to be the good child! You never even gave him a chance at life! You killed him before he had the chance to live you evil, worthless bitch!"

At this point my father was screaming at the top of his lungs and I felt the first few tears begin to drip pathetically from my face. My father's hand wrapped itself in my hair and he yanked me, yelping, into a standing position. "It wasn't enough for you to take your brother from me!" Another painful yank of the hair and a rough shove into the wall. "But no, you took your mother too! It's your fault your mother died! You killed your mother!" He shoved me into the wall a few more times, but then he grabbed another fistful of my hair and threw me to the ground. I bounced a couple of times, lying a few feet away from him like a limp and discarded doll, coughing as I tried to breathe and trying my hardest not to choke on tears and blood.

"What do you have to say for yourself, devil? Murderer? Are you happy? Are you happy that you killed your mother and your little brother? Are you?"

He advanced again, and he kicked me hard in the side of the head. The room spun in dizzying circles and I felt sick, both from pain and the guilt devouring me. Tears poured relentlessly from my eyes as I tried to reply, but before I could make a sound my father advanced again. Fearing that he might actually do damage that I couldn't fix by myself, I scrambled away on my hands and knees, reaching the wall and using it to prop myself up into a standing position. Just as my vision was clear enough that I could see about two copies of everything in the room, I saw the bottle of vodka flying my way and ducked.

Thank God my reflexes were fast because if I hadn't ducked, the bottle would have shattered on my head. However, as it was, it shattered just above it, and glass exploded everywhere, cutting my face and arms. Crying out in pain and feeling dangerously trapped, I looked up to see my father directly in front of me. Wrapping his hands around my throat, he leaned forward and hissed, "They were the good ones. You were supposed to die, you little wretch. You were the one who was supposed to die!"

I opened my mouth and gagged a little, trying to get enough breath to say something despite my father's hand cutting off my airway. I managed a strangled little noise that could barely be considered a sentence, but my father obviously heard it considering he slammed me into the ground, on the pile of glass, spitting, "What did you say?"

Tears and blood soaked my face, and I felt the pricks of tiny little pieces of glass digging into the skin all over my body. Whimpering and clenching my eyes closed, I ground out through clenched teeth and tears, "I know! Goddammit, I _know!_"

My father spat on me, muttering more insults before forcing my face further into the glass, causing me to scream. "I'm sorry," I mumbled, tears leaking from my eyes even more as the movement of my mouth forced even more glass into me skin. Standing and kicking me one last time, my father then stormed down the stairs, a drunken and furious mess.

I lay in the glass for a while, feeling too much pain to physically force myself to move. Fear and adrenaline coursed heavily through my veins, and I realized that my father could have killed me tonight. And he wouldn't have thought twice. That reality in itself brought on a whole new round of sobs.

Finally deciding that I had enough glass shards in my body, I gently placed my hands under me and pushed into a sitting position, crying out as the weight caused more glass to dig into my hands and other parts of my body. Whimpering and biting my already bloody lip to keep from screaming, I forced myself to stand, choking on a mangled sob and leaning against the wall.

Everything in me hurt. My body ached and there was blood everywhere. Oh God, there was so much blood. It was almost like when…. No. No no no. Don't think of that, I told myself. Don't think of that.

Padding carefully and clumsily down the hall, I reached my bathroom and flipped on the light. Blood stained the switch where I touched and when I saw my reflection I fell to my knees, so completely shocked and terrified that the pain of the glass digging deeper into my skin didn't register.

My jaw was a dark, livid purple, my eye was swollen and blue. My lip was split and gushing blood, and my nose was gushing blood, too. Both of my arms were cut and bleeding, and the right side of my face was cut to oblivion because that was the side my father shoved into the glass. Speaking of, my whole body sparkled. It would have been pretty if it weren't for all the blood. There was glass in my hair, sprinkled down my arms, stomach, legs. It was embedded in my clothes and skin, glistening like a precious and costly jewel. There were even little shards resting in my eyelashes, a miracle that they hadn't gone into my eyes. And then there was the bright, sparkling scarlet liquid that accompanied it. And the pain. There was so much pain.

But the part that terrified me most was knowing that there was more. That underneath my clothes there would be more bruises, more cuts. That I had hundreds of little glass shards in my body and that I alone would have to get each one out. And that no matter how much makeup I wore, I couldn't hide this. And I had a sleepover and shopping spree tomorrow.

Sucking in a pained breath, I stood, and just then, heard the thudding of footsteps and I froze. My father was back. Feeling my heart race more and more the closer the footsteps got, I turned to face the bathroom door, but who I saw in the doorway wasn't my father. It was a boy with white hair and electric blue eyes.

**Oh my God that was a really long chapter. And it sucked at that I'm sorry I suck at life. **

**Anyway, so I hope you are at least a little okay with the chapter and I want to say thanks to my friend for not only helping me with writing it but for letting me use his character, Tristan. **

**I'll hopefully update soon and apologize for any errors in my writing because I was rushed and didn't do as much editing as usual. Love all of you for reading and please don't forget to favorite, follow, and review!**

**-Lett**


	11. Chapter 11

**What's up fanfictioners? I hope all of you are doing great and that none of you are ready to kill me for leaving you in suspense for this long….. **

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed and said that they loved the last chapter, because it seriously still surprises me every time you guys say that you like my shitty writing. You guys never fail to make me smile and feel slightly less disgusted with myself :)**

**Anyway, enough with my boring talking, here's the next chapter. Enjoy ^^**

I stared at the boy in wide eyed wonder, my legs shaking and my lip trembling as tears streamed down my burning cheeks. What the hell was he doing here?! How the hell had he even _found_ me? What was I gonna do? I couldn't very well tell him that I'd done this to myself since he'd seen my father storming angrily out of the house! Feeling panicked and scared, I stumbled back, falling to the floor with a pained hiss and muttered profanities.

Looking up from my place on the ground, I saw the boy standing awkwardly in the doorway, looking confused. He seemed shocked and completely unsure of what to make of the situation, but he recovered quickly. "Oh my God, are you okay? What the hell did he do to you?"

"I'm fine," I choked out. Swallowing hard and trying to stand, I pushed up with my glass filled hands and made a strangled little noise. The boy (I couldn't remember his name for the life of me) seemed to realize my pain because he quickly came forward, crouching in front of me.

"Hey, let me help you, man," he said, giving me a look somewhere between sympathy and uncertainty. Biting my lip and debating whether I should let him help me, I finally shook my head.

"It's alright. I got it. You can just…..go home," I said awkwardly, completely uncomfortable in the strange boy's presence and trying to focus on something other than the pain.

"Wait…. Are you a girl or a guy," he asked curiously, cocking his head to the side as I stared at him in wide-eyed wonder. Was he serious? I was covered in glass and beaten to a bloody pulp, and he wanted to know if I was a _girl? _

"What kind of question is that," I asked defensively, feeling nervous and really _really_ uncomfortable. What if he found out my secret?

The boy shook his head, eyes wide. "Oh, I'm sorry! I just realized how that probably sounded. I didn't mean to imply anything, I just…. It's just that you really remind me of this girl I used to know…," he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck in uncertainty.

I stared at him. What the hell was up with this albino? First it was mango pudding and now he's watching as I cry and bleed out, talking about how I remind him of some girl he used to know? Of all the insanity…..

Shaking my head, I said, "Yeah whatever. I really don't care about some chick you used to now. I just want you out of my house." I began to try to stand up but the action set my body on fire, so I ended up simply hissing and falling rather ungracefully on my ass. Again.

The boy shook his head. "I'm not going anywhere. You need help. In fact, you should probably go to a hospital. Here, I'll drive you-"

My eyes widened and I quickly yelped, "NO! No, it's fine! I really don't need to go to the hospital!"

The albino tilted his head, looking confused yet again. "Um, you're covered in glass, bruises, and blood, crying hysterically, and you can't stand. That's my definition of needing a hospital," he said matter-of-factly.

Sniffling and wiping away the tears I was now majorly self-conscious about, I spat, "Well thank you, smart ass, but I didn't ask for your definition, did I? I don't need your help! Now will you kindly get the fuck out of my house? In case you haven't noticed, my night has been really shitty so far and I am not in the mood to deal with strange albino boys I met at a diner, much less let said boy drive me to a goddamned hospital! Goodnight and have a nice life!" I shot a smirk his direction and motioned irritably to the door.

"Woah man, calm down! I didn't mean to piss you off. No hospitals, alright," he said in a pacifying tone.

I glared at him, hissing through agonized sobs, "I don't think you get it! I don't want you here! I don't _need_ you! All I want is for you to get out of my house so I can suffer and clean my wounds in peace! Just leave me alone!"

The boy looked indignant. "Look, you need help, like it or not! I really don't give a damn what you want at this point! I'm sorry you've had a shitty night and your father just beat the living hell out of you, but I am not leaving you alone to deal with this! Now will you kindly shut up and let me help you," he grumbled irritably.

I was aware of my mouth hanging open and shock registering somewhere in the back of my mind, but I quickly pushed all of that away as indignant anger seeped through my body. Who the hell did this guy think he was, telling _me_ that I had to let him help me because my father beat me and I "needed" it? I had been alone every fucking night since I was eight! I had never had anyone to help me, whether I was bleeding and needed stitches, bruised, cut, couldn't breathe, or any other horrible thing my father did to me! And now here this albino was, telling me about how my father beat me as if he'd known about it all along!

"I don't need your help! I've dealt with my father before and I really don't take kindly to you, a fucking stranger, walking into my house and telling me what to do! So what? My father beat me to a bloody pulp. You wanna know something? He's done it almost every night for about eight years! And never once have I had somebody to help me! When I was eight years old I would bandage myself and cry and plead with my mother to help me, but she wasn't there and neither was anyone else! So no, I will not shut up and let you help me because I don't need anyone anymore," I hissed, choking on sobs and resenting the tears flowing freely from my cheeks.

The boy looked completely shocked, opening and closing his mouth while I sat shaking and panting on the floor. I was scared and in pain and fighting the urge to pass out from too much emotional and physical stress, but I felt too uncertain of my situation. Inside of my head, I was going through a list of horrible but true names, calling myself weak, pathetic, ect, and hating the fact that I couldn't pull myself together. After all, it was only a beating and some glass. Why make such a big deal unless I was a weak little failure, which I obviously was.

Eventually the boy came around and remembered how to speak, pulling me from my reverie and simply whispering, "Oh my God, Scarlett is that you?"

I froze, my heart skipping a beat and my eyes widening in absolute shock. Horror gripped my stomach and panic made my throat close as I stared at the strange boy who knew my name. A whole new wave of nausea and fear rocked my body as I tried yet again to calm down. I failed miserably.

"Who the hell are you," I whispered, slowly and painfully backing away from the boy with bright eyes. "How do you know my-"

And then it hit me. Memories of a young boy with white hair and shocking blue eyes flooded my mind; him laughing, him pushing me off of a swing because it was his turn, the time he snuck into my room late at night because we had watched a horror movie and I was scared, all of it. He was my childhood friend; he had known me up until I moved after my mother's death. He was the only friend I'd had for years; the only person I had trusted.

Feeling absolute wonder, I slowly scooted forward and wrapped my arms gingerly around my old friend's neck, shaking and crying as he hesitantly hugged me back. "Tristan," I whispered. "Oh my God, I can't believe it's you!"

Tristan let me go, smiling in a sad way. "I thought it was you. Thank God I wasn't wrong; otherwise you probably woulda thought I was some sort of creeper." He laughed mirthlessly, finding an interesting crack in the floor to study while avoiding my gaze like the plague. He looked up again.

"It's been a while, Lett. Now how about you let me bandage you up so I can go and kick that bastard's ass," he asked, sounding absolutely furious. Anger glinted in his sky colored eyes, and I recalled all the times they had darkened in the past, reminding me of a stormy sky when I was younger.

I shook my head. "No. It's fine! I'll be alright! What I said earlier, about not needing help, it's true. I'll handle this. There's no reason for you-"

"No reason?! Are you kidding me, Lett? The first time I've seen you in eight years, and you're in a bathroom covered in glass and blood because of that disgusting excuse of a man! There's every reason for me to kick his ass!"

I sighed, shaking my head. I'd forgotten how defensive Tristan was, especially when it came to me. "It's not worth it. Why don't you just go home and I'll catch up with you Saturday at the diner-"

He cut me off again. "No. Lett, I don't care if you want my help, and I don't care if you hate me for this, but I am not leaving you now. I won't go after your father, but I am helping you clean up, whether you like it or not." He had set his jaw stubbornly, and I could tell I wasn't going to get anywhere without throwing bricks at his head, which I sadly didn't currently have the stamina to do (or the bricks to throw for that matter).

I opened my mouth to protest, but ended up just closing it again. Looking at the determined glint in his eyes and knowing that Tristan could be a stubborn ass if he wanted to, I simply sighed in defeat. "Fine. Whatever. I'm too tired to fight you on this right now."

Tristan let out a sigh of relief, a smile breaking onto his uneasy features. "Oh thank God! I was afraid I was going to have to drug you."

I raised an eyebrow but just shook my head, gripping it as the room spun out of focus. "You're just as demanding as I remember," I muttered, grudgingly looking away from him as he walked forward to pick me up.

"And you're just as independent as I remember," he shot back, gingerly picking me up. As I hissed in protest, Tristan just muttered, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," before quickly placing me on the bathroom counter.

Wincing as I hit the cool, hard porcelain of the countertop, I grumbled, "Could you please try to be more careful with the girl filled with _glass_?"

Tristan shot me an apologetic look while he dug through the cabinet beneath the sink. "Sorry! I just really don't know what to do with you…. You're hurt bad, Lett."

I nodded. "But of course. It wouldn't be a suitable punishment otherwise."

His head shot up from where he was rummaging through my first aid kit. "Hey, don't even joke like that! It's not funny!"

I simply looked away from the irritated expression and mumbled, "I didn't realize it was supposed to be."

"What," he demanded sharply.

Looking down and flashing an agonized smile, I quipped, "Oh nothing, nothing. Maybe you should clean out your ears some, T."

He rolled his eyes. "As sarcastic as ever I see. You wanna quit being a smartass for two minutes and help me out before I change my mind and take you to a hospital," he threatened.

I scoffed. "You wouldn't take me to a hospital. Not now. You know how much I hate them, unless you've forgotten. Besides, I couldn't afford it anyway," I remarked comfortably, knowing I had the upper hand. If it wasn't for the glass shards, blood, bruises, and absolute hellish agony one might even say I was just peachy.

Finally having found everything he wanted from the first aid kit, Tristan stood and placed his prizes on the counter, looking me in the eye. "Yeah, I know. I just figured I'd give the threatening thing a try. You were always better at that than me," he recalled fondly as he grabbed a pair of tweezers from the counter.

Glancing uneasily at the tweezers, I said, "If I recall correctly, I was better at fighting, threatening, and just about _everything_ when we were kids."

Tristan shot me a look and indignantly replied, "Not true! You couldn't boil water without burning it! If it weren't for me, you would've starved!"

I shot him a look. "Hey, that's not fair! I could make ramen and toast! That should count for something! And let's not forget eggs! I could scramble eggs!"

I could feel myself fighting a smile despite the fact that I was still bleeding and in agony. I had been looking for a distraction to keep my mind off of my throbbing body, and even though talking to my friend helped some, the pain was almost unbearable.

Tristan only chuckled again. "Okay, whatever Lett." He suddenly turned serious. "Brace yourself alright? I'm gonna start pulling the glass out of your skin, and if I'm right, it's gonna hurt like a bitch."

_It can't hurt much more than it does right now while it's embedded in my skin, _I thought. Sighing and giving a brief nod, I grumbled, "Alright. Just hurry up."

He nodded and then handed me a washcloth. I gave him a questioning look, to which he simply replied, "You're gonna want to bite that when I start pulling out the glass."

Suddenly understanding, I clenched my teeth and swallowed hard, placing the rag in my mouth and tying to prepare for the pain. Watching in fascination as the tweezers slowly descended upon my arm and Tristan bit his lip in concentration, I tensed up. Suddenly my heartbeat sped up a little while I waited apprehensively for the searing pain I knew was coming.

Breathing in deeply through my nose, I closed my eyes and began to count to ten. Suddenly, the idea of a hospital wasn't so bad. At least they had pain killers. When I had reached number three, I felt the cold metal of the tweezers stab into my skin and dig around in the flesh before I felt a twist and a pull. I inhaled a sharp breath, groaning in pain as tears formed behind my closed eyelids. Biting down on the rag, I tasted blood and tried to focus on anything but the feel of the cold and cruel metal probing my body. After what felt like an eternity, I heard a tiny _plink_ and slid open my eyes to see a glistening and bloody piece of glass sitting on the countertop. I still had a long way to go.

My heartbeat sputtered as I felt the panic grip my chest. I had hundreds, maybe even thousands of glass pieces in my body, and all of that pain had only come from removing one piece. To be quite honest, I was terrified. This was going to be one hellish night. Breathing shallowly and shaking as I felt the panic attack grip my body, I spit out the rag, looking pleadingly at Tristan.

His blue eyes were pained as he whispered, "How much did it hurt?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and croaked shakily, "It was alright. Go again."

I was lying through my teeth. Nothing could be this painful. The vodka was seeping into the open cuts and it burned like acid. I was bleeding from probably about eighty percent of my body, had bruises on my ribs, legs, and arms, and I could barely breathe because it felt like water rushed into my lungs every time I did. However, I kept all of that to myself as I shoved the the panic away and forced a tiny smile, resting my arm limply in my lap, waiting for him to begin the next operation.

Tristan gave me a doubtful look, but eventually he nodded, allowing me to sit watching every move he made. The washcloth he'd given me was on the floor from when I'd carelessly spit it out, but I didn't want it anyway. I could do this. I would be strong.

The next hour was spent with Tristan meticulously picking at my left arm, getting every single shard of glass out. It hurt like hell. The tweezers were cold and relentless, and I watched as they pulled not only glass, but skin, from my arm. Blood was always flowing, and I often bit my lip to keep from screaming, or sobbing, or both. By the time my left arm was finished, I was shaking and covered in sweat, my lip bloody and completely raw from biting it. I had been fighting the urge to vomit as the room blurred in and out of focus, but I remained silent the whole time.

When he had finished with my first arm, Tristan looked up from his work and sighed. "Well, that's one arm. Only one more to go. Then we've got your legs, stomach, sides, back, neck, and face. You sure you can handle this?"

I froze for a moment, going into another small panic attack when I realized just how little we had accomplished. However, there was a hesitance in Tristan's voice that made me all the more certain. He sounded as though he doubted my capability to handle the pain. Which meant that I had to do this. I had to prove I could take the pain my father had dealt me. Swallowing bile, I croaked weakly, "This is nothing. Bring it."

Tristan looked surprised, obviously seeing right through my bluff, but he continued on to my right arm. That one took an hour and a half and it seemed even more agonizing than the last; I vaguely wondered if it was because my father had stomped on it and there was more glass stuck in it. My skin was raw and pulled open from where the tweezers kept digging into my already cut open arm, but I never once cried. My lip of course, was bloody and raw because of how hard I was biting it, but that was trivial.

Sighing as Tristan rinsed the blood and skin from the metal monsters he was probing me with, I muttered, "So, you come here often?"

Tristan chuckled. "Nah, only when I know pretty girls from my past might need me."

"Mmm, that might be a deal breaker then. I'm no pretty girl from your past. And you certainly don't fit the bill, princess," I teased hoarsely as I grimaced from the pain wracking my body.

"Damn, I've always wanted to be a princess," Tristan said in mock disappointment. The teasing quickly stopped as he said quietly, "You ready to get more glass?"

I winced, nodding. Through clenched teeth, I ground out, "Sounds like a plan. Where to next?"

Tristan thought for a moment, clenching and unclenching his fists nervously. "Well…. Eventually we're gonna have to get your legs and stomach, but that requires you to remove clothes, and _what are you doing_," he asked abruptly, blushing a bright and brilliant red as I hopped down from the counter, scowling and muttering profanities, while painfully starting to lift my shirt.

I cast him a sideways glance. "What? Are you seriously blushing," I questioned with a slight laugh, which immediately led to a cough, which immediately led to a wince and blood being spit into the sink. Note to self: laughing leads to a freaking blood exorcism.

Tristan was turned away from me. "Well, yeah! I mean, seriously Lett? You just started taking off your shirt, what'd you want me to do?"

I could tell he was uncomfortable and I found it highly amusing, though I couldn't exactly show it while I was unable to breathe properly. (Props to my dad- he knew where to kick.)

I cocked an eyebrow. "Um, react like a normal person? I mean, Jesus, I'm not _that_ disgusting! Plus, we used to freaking take baths together when we were younger! What's the difference?"

"The difference is that we're not five anymore! And…..and…," I watched as he sputtered, embarrassed and blushing like mad. What was holding him up? God it wasn't like it meant anything. He was like a brother.

Sighing, I threw my shirt into the sink, watching with grotesque fascination as the fabric rained sharp and sparkly little raindrops. "Okay, whatever. I really don't care if you're comfortable with this or not, because seriously, you have nothing to complain about. I've got glass in my skin, and believe it or not, every piece is kinda covered in vodka and burns, so I would love it if you'd kindly stop bitching and get the glass out of my fucking body. Sound fair," I asked, trying to sound lightweight and airy, when in reality I sounded like I was being choked.

That seemed to grab his attention, and he quickly returned to his old self, even though he still wore a small blush. Rolling my eyes and scoffing, I turned around and braced my arms on the sink, feeling disgusted as I saw my protruding ribs (not eating could do that to you) and all of the livid bruises, most of which were in the shape of boot marks, courtesy of my father. On top of the bruises was all the blood and shimmering glass, which of course only added to my disgust. _I swear to God if I ever see glass again,_ I thought bitterly. Suddenly hearing a surprised intake of breath, I forced myself to look over my shoulder at my friend.

"Oh my God. Lett…"

I winced at the tone of his voice. It sounded…..broken. Deciding it would be best to keep the pain as far from the surface as possible so as not to hurt him more, I quietly said, "It's not that bad. It barely even hurts! The glass is just an inconvenience. Though, I really would like it out of my body….."

Tristan shook his head. "Lett, there is no way this doesn't hurt. I've never seen anything like this! You're black and blue and bloody and I think you might need stitches! Hell, you might have broken ribs, and you're coughing up blood! I don't know what to do!"

I froze. I wasn't sure what to tell him. It had never occurred to me that my friend wasn't used to seeing me this way. I mean, technically he'd seen the bruises when we were children, but it'd never been this bad then. And I definitely had never been this unhealthily skinny when we were younger

"Tristan, I'm fine! I've had scrapes like this before. I promise I know what I'm doing. I just need you to get the glass out of me," I said soothingly.

He sighed, picking up the tweezers and grumbling, "I can't believe you just called this a scrape you idiot."

I silently turned back around, bracing my hands on the sink again. Rolling my shoulders back and mentally bracing myself for the pain, I started to count again, letting my eyes stare at the blood spattered sink.

A sudden and searing pain tore through my skin, and before I could stop myself, I whimpered. _Oh God, this hurt a lot more than my arms._ Tears stung my eyes as the muscles in my tired arms tensed, trembling slightly.

Tristan muttered apology after apology, simply pulling shard after bloody shard from my flesh. By the time he had finished half of my back, I was shaking and fighting full-on screaming. My vision was fuzzy and I had to keep myself from falling. I knew my body was becoming exhausted, and as my eyes drifted from the sink to the floor, I could tell I'd lost a sufficient amount of blood. Trying to breathe deep, I randomly wondered if I could have a concussion or if I could go into a coma. I quickly pushed both thoughts away.

Biting into my cheek (my lip was far too raw at that point), I cried out when Tristan pulled at a particularly painful shard. Hissing in a breath, I felt the tweezers twisting and tugging, then a slight pull at my skin. I could feel the glass moving inch by inch through the muscle in my side, and I whimpered, clenching my fists on the countertop. Giving up on biting my cheek, I returned to biting into my lip and focusing on the metallic taste of my blood. I barely kept from passing out.

Just when I thought I would burn up from the agony, the pulling stopped and Tristan cussed loudly, throwing the tweezers down in a bloody mess on the sink.

Panting, I croaked, "What the hell? Tristan what's wrong?"

"What's wrong? What's wrong is I can't do this anymore! I'm not going to sit here hurting you, and I'm not going to sit here and watch you lie through your teeth about there being no pain! I can tell it hurts Lett, because I can watch you bleed and hear the tear of your skin, and I just can't do this! I'm taking you to the hospital."

"NO! Please….You can do this, I know you can! You're not hurting me, I promise! And even if you are, so what? I'd rather you do this than someone else!" I was desperate and in pain, and I slightly wondered if he knew that.

"Oh, that's just great, Lett! So I'm the chosen one," he hissed acidically.

I winced at his tone. "That's not what I meant and you know it! Now please, just help me! I can't do this alone," I whimpered desperately.

"Lett, there's a huge piece of glass sticking out of your freaking ribs! There is no more I can do for you! I don't know what to do! I tried pulling it out, and it won't budge. I'm afraid that I'm going to hit something vital." He looked panicked and tired, and I was exhausted, too. Checking the clock, I realized it was a little bit past 12:00, and that he had been trying to clean me up for almost three hours now.

Taking a shaky breath, I whispered, "Alright, give me the tweezers."

Tristan's head shot up, his blue eyes wide and bloodshot. "What?"

I took a large, wavering breath again. "Give….me….the…..tweezers."

Tristan looked suspicious. "No. This time it's too risky. It's embedded near your heart, Lett," he said somberly.

I turned so that the left side of my ribs faced the mirror, and I instantly found what he was talking about.

Sticking about an inch out of my side, wedged precariously between two of my ribs (and yes, they were the ones closest to my heart), was a large piece of glass. My side where it was sticking out was quite gruesome, and I could've sworn I saw a portion of my rib among the shredded tissue and blood.

Grimacing at the horrible sight and damn near sobbing at what I knew I was about to do, I turned to Tristan and gestured silently for the tweezers. When he shook his head, I gave him a pointed look and growled, "For God's sake it's not a freaking knife and it doesn't have a handle to yank it out with, so will you kindly give me the tweezers so I can get this stupid shard from my side?"

Tristan glared at me, fuming as he spat, "There is no way in hell I'm letting you touch these tweezers."

_He wants to play that game? __**Fine, **_I thought, quietly telling the parts of me that were panicking to shut up. Glaring back and giving him a nod, I simply bit my lip _really_ hard, reached down with my hand, and grabbed the shard. Wincing as the glass bit into my palm and groaning in absolute agony, I slowly began to pull the shard from my ribs. Due to my hands being bloody, I could barely keep a grip, but whenever my hand began to slide, I would simply push down and slide it back up the glass, tearing open my palm as I went. (Yes, that is as painful as it sounds. I'll most likely have a scar from doing it.)

As I pulled, I was painfully aware of the fire shooting up my arm and the sound of my blood pattering on the floor as it gushed from my side.

"LETT STOP," Tristan yelled, running forward as the first few tears fell from my face.

Gritting my teeth even tighter, I simply choked, "NO. I have to finish this!"

However, it wasn't long after that that my hand finally slipped and Tristan quickly caught my arm, staring at me with absolute, unadulterated rage. I was shaking and hyperventilating, and I think I might have been on the verge of going into shock. However, I stared into my friend's dark, angry eyes.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, idiot? Are you stupid," he yelled as he pulled me rather forcefully to his chest in a super tight hug.

Yelping, I said, "You wouldn't give me the tweezers and I refuse to go to the hospital or live with this damned glass shard in my side!"

He quickly let me go when he realized that it hurt for him to hug me, and after a long moment he grudgingly said, "Alright, lean on the sink and brace yourself. When I pull that bastard out it's gonna hurt. It might take a few tries and I'm probably going to have to stitch you up afterwards because you've already lost a lot of blood and this is going to be a bleeder."

Relief rushed into my body as I knew I wouldn't have to do that to myself anymore. However, it was short lived when I realized that this battle was far from over. I nodded mutely, praying to any God (hell, I even shot a small prayer down to the devil) listening and then leaned against the sink.

"Alright, when I tell you, I need you to take a really, really big breath, one so big it hurts. Can you do that for me Scar?"

Remembering the old nickname and smiling slightly, I nodded.

"Okay. Go."

I took in a huge, deep breath, and I almost passed out. My vision blurred white for a second and my lungs felt ready to burst. The shard in my side shifted dangerously close to my rib, and I felt blood seep from the edges of the wound as more skin ripped. Tears fell from my eyes.

I swore to myself then that the pain couldn't get worse. I was wrong.

Suddenly, Tristan was pulling on the shard with the tweezers again, and I couldn't help it. I screamed. The pain was more intense than anything I had gone through ever before, and let me be the first to say that that takes a lot. I felt every inch of the glass as it was slowly pulled through my muscle and tissue. Hot tears flowed freely down my face, and the air that had rushed from my lungs during the scream refused to come back. Unable to breathe and shaking uncontrollably, I bunched my hands into fists and let my fingernails dig in long and deep. Blood trickled from my lip as I bit into it with all my might, and yet the pain still intensified.

There was a sick moment when I thought it would never end and that I would surely die from the red hot fire searing through my body and coursing through my veins, but then there was the sudden and intensely excruciating moment when I felt the glass scrape against my rib bone, and then there was a sickening sucking noise as it was pulled completely from my side.

Once the sharp object was gone, I was still crying as I sucked in a huge and gasping breath. Trying to breathe seemed unnatural, and I found part of me wishing I were dead and unable to feel the pain I was experiencing. Shaking and bleeding everywhere, I stumbled and threw up into the sink. All that came out of me was blood.

Retching on the metallic taste filling my mouth, I quickly turned on the faucet and scooped water into my hands, slurping it to get rid of the taste. When I tried to swallow, I threw up again, and this time the blood was pink from the water.

Feeling dizzy and absolutely terrified, I turned to Tristan, who immediately picked me up and placed me very carefully on the toilet seat. Wiping my tears away gently with his thumb, he whispered, ""I'm so sorry all of this has happened. If I'd realized he hadn't stopped hurting you, I never woulda let you leave. Hell, at this point, I'd even take a glass shard to my ribs if it meant you didn't have to go through this."

I let a breath hiss through my nose, shaking my head mutely as my old friend just continued to wipe the tears from my dirty face. "I wouldn't let you take this pain from me. I earned it," I mumbled quietly, making sure I spoke the first part loud enough that he could hear and the second so he couldn't.

Regaining my breath was difficult, but after it had become almost easy to breathe, I quietly recommended, "Why don't you stitch my side? I think you were right earlier, about me needing them. This wound is definitely a bleeder."

Nodding, Tristan grabbed a needle and some thread, giving me a part of his shirt to squeeze when I needed to deal with the pain. I didn't deal with it well.

Half way through Tristan's stitching, I whispered hoarsely, "Where is it?"

He looked confused, and for a moment I think he thought I was delirious. "Where is what?"

"The piece we pulled from my ribs. I…want to see it," I rattled breathlessly.

Looking slightly relieved at the fact that I wasn't hallucinating, Tristan turned and grabbed a long, jagged piece of glass from the countertop, quietly handing it to me. It was crystal clear and covered in my blood. Little rivers of red tears dripped from the pointed end of the six inch stake that had pierced my ribs. Staring in horrified fascination, I twirled the glass between my fingers. It could have killed me. It was six inches long and roughly four inches wide at the widest part, and it honestly could have pierced my heart. Shaking, placed it back on the countertop.

When he had finished stitching me up, I heard him mutter something about finishing the last of the glass removal. Feeling tears slide even faster down my cheeks, I breathed deeply and waited for more pain. I hadn't stopped crying since my side was taken care of, and I had a feeling I wouldn't be stopping soon.

After what felt like a full eternity of torture, I felt the tweezers move to my side and turned around to face Tristan. At that point, I was tired, crying, shaking, bleeding, and in so much pain that I had lost sense of everything other than the searing agony ripping me to shreds.

The rest of the glass removal, both from my back and legs, was unimaginably hellish (I'd honestly rather be burned alive than have to go through that again), but it was a piece of cake compared to my side. I continued to cry through the rest of the process, and I admit I screamed many times. The most screams came from when Tristan was gently pulling glass from my face and neck, however by the end of it, there was nothing distinguishable about anything.

My vision was glazed over when he was finally one hundred percent done. I still shook uncontrollably, and my skin was very cold despite my body's internal fire. Breathing raggedly, I felt the needle-like sensation of all of my tiny wounds, and part of me felt like I was drowning, being held under the water while I screamed and thrashed, yet being pulled up just before I drowned. The feeling was terrifying.

My bruises were sore, but they seemed extremely irrelevant, as did the entire world at that point. Pain became my only conscious receptor, and everything else was just mindless static amongst thrashing waves. Somewhere in the depths of the waves, I knew my consciousness was being pulled further and further away, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

Gagging and choking, I threw up more blood, and I vaguely heard Tristan's voice, though trying to focus on it made my head ache as though an ice pick were digging into my skull. Moaning, I forced my eyes to focus, and I managed to see only two copies of my friend instead of the ten I'd been seeing moments before.

"…et…lett…rlett…..Scarlett."

I realized that Tristan had been calling my name, looking frantically at me for some time now.

"What," I asked groggily, my tongue thick and my speech slurred and slow.

"Hey, I need you to look at me okay? Focus on me, and, uh, talk about yourself while I finish bandaging you up. Can you do that for me Scar?"

I stared at him dazedly, realizing what he wanted me to do but not quite sure how to talk. How did that work again? I couldn't seem to remember. Feeling frustrated, I stood up, slamming my hip into the sink as I rocked unsteadily on my feet before regaining my balance, turning on the faucet, and throwing water onto my hot cheeks. My vision cleared, more or less returning back to normal, and I turned to Tristan.

"What do you want me to talk about?" My voice sounded hollow in my ears and echoed through my head, but I quickly pushed that aside. I needed to do this. I needed to keep conscious.

"Anything you want Scar. Now sit down while I clean the blood from your face, wash your wounds, and wrap them. Then I'm taking you next door to my place. Okay?"

Despite my hazy stupor, I was still fully aware of the fact that he'd said take me to his place. Focusing seemed to help keep me from teetering dangerously on the edge of unconsciousness and the coma possibly waiting on the other side, so I decided to grasp at that simple fact.

"What do you mean your place next door? You live here?"  
Tristan smiled encouragingly as he gently but efficiently washed my face. "Yeah. I just transferred schools a few weeks ago and today was my first day in town. We apparently go to the same school, but when I heard your name I didn't recognize it because it was shortened and everyone referred to you as a guy, and an asshole at that. Now I know that the school badass is no other than you. Why am I not surprised," he joked.

I tried to smile, but quickly dropped it when it hurt too much. "I dunno. Why aren't you surprised? So, today was your first day at Hellhole High, huh? I wish I woulda known. If you were a sophomore we might have had classes together."

"Eh, I like being a junior. Perks of being seventeen," he said distractedly.

My eyes were beginning to droop, and I quickly searched for another topic to focus on before the blood loss whisked my consciousness away. "Hey, T, do you remember when we were little and we used to sneak onto the roof to watch the sky?"

A small smile tugged at his lips as I felt the sting of the alcohol while he cleaned my cuts. "Of course. I used to have to pick you up to get you onto the lowest branch of the tree. And your mom used to get so mad! She hated it when we'd fall asleep up there!"

I chuckled slightly, smiling at the fond memory of a better time. "She used to swear we were gonna roll off and break our necks."

Tristan nodded, smiling widely as he grabbed the gauze. "But she never made us stop."

I shook my head slowly, clenching my fingers on the countertop. "No, she didn't," I murmured quietly. "She always said that it was my decision to be the one close to the sky. She said that I was too great for the ground anyway."

Noticing my sudden and unexpected mood change, Tristan quickly said, "What about movie night? Do you remember that?"

I forced a small smile, but my heart wasn't in it. "Yeah. It was every week on Friday. Remember the time we watched The Exorcist and we couldn't sleep for weeks? You snuck into my room for days because I didn't want to sleep alone…..," I trailed off, the memories no longer happy as images of my mother covered in blood filled my head and fought for space.

Shaking, I simply looked up at my friend who was now concerned for me. "Are you done? I'm really tired. I've got school tomorrow and I have to wake up early to get on makeup and prepare for my stupid shopping spree," I said brokenly.

"Yeah, I just finished. I'll help you out tomorrow, alright? I can walk with you around school and I'll help keep your bruises and cuts hidden. Can you cancel the shopping though," he asked carefully, trying not to set me off. He knew what I was like when I got like this.

Sighing, I sadly shook my head. The memories still swirled in and out of focus. Blood, tears, yelling….. Tristan had asked me something, hadn't he?

Returning to the present, I slurred, "I can't. I promised my friend that I'd go a long time ago and I need to make this up to her. I can't get out of it. She's really excited and a bunch of us are shopping and having a sleepover at her house….."

Tristan groaned. "Alright. I'll figure something out. We should be able to come up with something-"

"No it's fine. I'll deal with it myself. I'm a big girl. Besides, you won't be able to help me shop and you definitely can't go to the sleepover," I said quickly, cutting him off before he had the chance to even try and help me. I slid clumsily from my place on the counter and stiffly pulled my shirt over my head. _Ouch._

Tristan opened his mouth, then simply closed it as he sighed in defeat. "Look, I'm not gonna argue about this with you now. You're dead tired and you need sleep. We'll figure everything out in the morning. Until then, let's crash at my place in case your father tries to make a repeat of tonight."

I was about to protest but decided against it as my eyes drooped and memories slid behind my closed lids. My mother laughing, crying, the vacant look in her eyes after Damon died… I shook my head just as Tristan picked me up, carrying me with ease as he exited my shitty apartment.

I tried to protest, but my words only jumbled together in a slurred and incomprehensible mess, tears leaking from my eyes as I fought off the pain and fear and memories.

Tristan carried me down the hall about six doors (I wasn't sure of the exact number because my vision kept going black) and then gently set me down while he dug in his pocket for keys and then proceeded to noisily unlock the door. Blinking my eyes to fight the gray and hazy blur, I followed him uncertainly into his apartment.

"I know it's not much, but I'm kinda broke so it's the best I can do. The bathroom is down the hall on the right and you can grab anything you want from the kitchen as long as it's not pudding. You can crash in my room for the night. It's the last door on the left….," Tristan mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck as he trailed off uncertainly.

Facing him, I tried to comprehend what he was saying. When the words finally registered, I said quietly, "Are you sure? I mean, it's your room and everything. If I take it, where will you sleep?"

Tristan smiled slightly, looking completely worn out. "I'm one hundred percent positive. Take my room for the night. I'll sleep on the couch. Go get some sleep Scar. I'll see you in the morning."

I stared at him, debating whether I should fight him on the present situation, but I ended up just nodding haggardly and stumbling towards his room. I was far too tired to fight with Tristan even though I knew he should have had the bed. I'd feel guilty about it later.

Reaching the last door in the hall (there were only two others) I slid my fingers around the cool handle and tumbled into the darkness of the room. Letting tears slide helplessly down my cheeks, I limped over to the bed and sunk tiredly into the sheets, curling up into a broken ball as I let my eyes drift closed.

That night, I dreamt of my mother's death.

**THIS IS IMPORTANT SO PLEASE READ IT!**

**Okay so here's the deal guys. **

**I know it's summer and everything, and I honestly planned to update more, but I've got a job, and I've got a bunch of homework from my AP class, and I've been having a really hard time at home, so that's why I've been taking so long to update. I'm sorry **

**However, to make it up to you guys, I will be updating more frequently AND taking requests!**

**That's right. If you have story you want me to write (it can be anything; a one-shot of a couple you like, a full story, whatever) you can tell me in a review or through PM and I will write it for you and post it for all of you to see. I'll only be taking requests for about three weeks but I will try to cover every single request I get- even if it means I have to read a new book or watch a new anime! **

**Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and don't forget to favorite, follow, and review- maybe you'll motivate me to update sooner ;) Love you all!**

**Until next time**

**-Scarlett**


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